Believe to Achieve

easy miles on my new treadmill.  first treadmill.   a gift from jane.  a very fast runner and a very good friend.  thanks again jane.  avg pace 8:30. 1 percent incline.

words cannot not express the amount of exhaustion I felt yesterday after work---I was in bed from 730pm until the next morning at 7am. Got kids off to school and fell back to sleep at 9-1130am!! still wasted tired.  holy moly.  but forced myself to mill it.   i actually got in the intended workout albeit slower and broken down more than i would have if i didn't feel drugged to the max without drugs.  Ran two miles at 1 % on tm at 8:57-8:27 pace.  Then started 8 mile tempo at 10 secs faster than marathon pace - goal 7:07 marathon pace (fantasy) so 6:58 for tempo but knew my fatigue was too much to even start there so I started at marathon pace 7:08 it was mill can do at 8.4 mph.  Ran a half mile and hopped off in utter zombie fatigue.  Was like "snap out of this Julie"  and started again.  Told myself I could take as many stops as I needed to to get it done.  Went another 1.5 miles at tempo pace of 7:08.  Stopped less than a minute and started again.  Two more miles at 7:08 pace.  Yay finially at 4 miles!!  Next I ran another two miles after a two minute stop to use the bathroom and take in some water--sweat fest in my basement TM room!!   This time I was able to do one at 7:03 the other at 7:08.  Then to mentally do it (the fatigue was intensely in my brain seriously)  I ran 7:03. Stopped less than a minute and another 7:03--a little faster as I picked it up the last quarter mile to 6:35 pace.  Ran 1 cooldown mile in 8:41, 1 % . 

busy morning.  run at 1110am from just above Lone Peak High school on trail (parking lot by golf course and bathroom).  Ran up two miles to and past mouth of canyon (1/4 mile past booth where you pay for your drive thru canyon).  then turned around and back to car.  SOOOO hot!!  And windy!!! Then repeated.  Was gonna try to run my 14 miles today since I work all day tomorrow (13 hour shift) but just couldn't hack the heat any longer.  Avg pace 8:10.  

worked all day. busy nursery admit shift.  Came home late (stayed an extra hour til 7:15!!) and ate dinner with NO intentions of running....but then somehow I talked my body into it.  AFTER a 13 hour shift on your feet and the stress running is never easy.  Now with food in tummy.  Funny.  Anyway so thankful for my gift from Jane (treadmill).  Got on and just knew I had to go easy as to not lose my cookies or my heart.  Two miles at 8:57, two miles at 8:49, two miles at 8:41....then at six miles followed my plans to run 6x 90 second surges with five minutes in between surges.  NORMALLY with rest and being the morning and this being 8:30 pm....a surge for just 90 seconds sounds doable.  But oh my heavens I was beat!!  Even the five minutes in between was mentally daunting!!  But I persevered....I finished the reps. A couple times (four I think) I stopped the treadmill to rest after the surges.  I surged only to 6:53 pace.  The entire run was at 1 % incline including surgers.    After the surges x 6 and five minutes in between I only had 3 miles to go!!!  So I knew I could finish.  TM turned over at 100 minutes (11.7 miles)..didn't know it would do that.  So was confused.   But I just started the time over and the other information still stayed on the TM...wow that was cool.  So finsihes the last 2.3.  FiNALLY.  AP 8:32.  Glad that is over.  Now I can't sleep as I type this at 2 am and have to be at work in three hours.  I got super nauseated and had to take tums.  I nearly threw up but that passed with the tums.  I don't think my body liked running at night.  

wasted tired but finished first part. bailed on second part 1.2 miles in...then Jane showed up as I was leaving so just added another fast one by her (even after I already cooled down).  The mill by her shook like no other so I had no desire to do more.  I was hungry.  5 miles at 6:53 miles. Then 1.2 miles at 6:53.  Then cooldown one mile at 8:42.  Then another 6:53.  Supposed to be 2 x 5 miles with four minute rest.  I always seem to lack energy after a weekend of hard worked hours (26.5 hours!!) 

home mill at 211pm.  easy paced miles.  8:14 ap.  1 % incline.

worked for a friend until 215pm from 6am.  appts then soccer game for amber.  too tired to run.  well and ran out of time then it was late.  

5 miles easy with six strides of 20 seconds at the end.  8:13 avg.

massive fatigue again. went to byu versus utah game last night with courtney.  won 1-0 at last two minutes of game.  went to work and my phone was dead and they tried to put me on call.  went home and did some bookkeeping and stayed up and now still way fatigued. tried to nap at 430pm.  fell asleep and woke to nearly choking to death. was very scary. thought i was dying.  woke me out of my massive fatigue when i came to.  seriously very strange.  reflux moment??? 

yay hit 500 miles on my kinvaras albeit with holes on the top!! Anyway...sleepless night as usual for me these days but frustrating.  Awoke to alarm (did sleep 3.5 hours so technically not sleepless)at 3:42am. Drove up to Cotton Wood Heights.  Got on second bus to the top of the start of the half.  Ran 3.5 miles then another .37 before the race (ap 8:35).  Ran up and back down in the pitch black avoiding buses heading up for the start of the marathon.  It was very cold up there and this was wise in order to wake my body and warm it.  I got up there at 525am and the race starts at 6:45am.   Well met up and met my pace partner along with hanging with pace group for a moment.  We were unaware how close it was to start time apparently. NO announcement and the race was started before we even knew it.  I still had my race bag with me so ran off back in the area of the second loading truck a quarter of a mile away.  I came back and noticed the race had started.  I was in shock.  At mile one I passed the 2:00 pacer.  I was passing tons of people sprinting down the mountain not ready at all to be running faster than goal 1:30 pace.  I had put my watch in average pace mode which turned out to help me (as later when I noticed I had run a 5:59 and 6:09 mile for miles 5 and 6) .  Had I seen these paces I would have assuredly inwardly be anxious about how fast I was running and immediately slow down.  I pretty much ran by feel.  Paces were--6:52, 6:42, 6:41, 6:23, 5;59, 6:09, 6:31 (shoe came untied,hard to stop when flying and hard to start rolling again but it happened), 6:14, 6:36, 6:52,  Intentionally slowing or for sure I would be in at 1:26...7:30, 6:54, 7:25, and 0.17 at 7:14 pace ( realized I was close to 1:27 but too late in this noticing...but it wasn't a race for me) .  Basically I cheered anyone I could on the way down...chasing my pace partner who incidentally is in the results right next to my name (she ran 1:27:50).  13 seconds apart in chip time although I started 3.5 minutes after her!! ha ha.  I passed the 1:40 pacers at mile 4 and was trying my hardest to catch Melissa but apparently she too was flying fast.  Anyway....last year I ran it perfect.  I thought arriving early I would be even more perfect.  Totally bummed.  But wow I got a good work out.  Ran 3 miles after race at 8:38 ap. 

so sore from downhill running fast saturday.  ap 9:15.  started at 10ap so 9:15 is pretty good. took my mom up for ct scan at huntsman.  neck and arm pain are quite bad.  (me).  Been going on since end of july.  tendinits/arthritis of neck shoulder and arm.  but need to see a dr.  it ain't going away. boo. 

too sore and too fatigued. developed a small shingles-like rash on right rib cage.  however i did pee in woods up cottonwood canyon and there was poison sumac that i remember seeing there.  so it is probably that.  

2 warmup.    some deep buttock pain-muscle pain noted.  did 8 x 800s with one minute rest in between (two minutes after fifth one for a water break).  Ran them at 10k pace.  6:27 x 4, 6:22 x 4.    The last one my leg really was bugging so I broke it into two 0.32 miles.  So shorter but overall longer.  One mile cooldown.  8:47.  Leg on right (IT band) giving me trouble.  Probably should have taken entire week off.  Just tired in general.

7 miles easy.  was gonna try 13 but just too tired.  treadmill.  1 percent incline.  3 percent incline alternated with 4 percent incline at the end of each mile for 0.25 miles.  very slow.

work too tired to run. 13 hour shift tiring.

work.  same tiring 13 hour shift.  took sacrament at work.  

still tired to run. well and i picked up a shift on NICU at UVRMC for 6.75 hours.  Very busy there.  

six easy outside.  8:19 avg pace. First mile 9:03. Last mile 7:31.

work for Taunya while she is Hawaii.   Wish I was.  ha ha.  long 12.5 hour shift.  no run.  pretty fatigued every day.  shingles and braces not a good combo.  shingles are a small patch on my rib cage of like 10-12 blisters that have diminished 30 -40 percent since they showed up a week ago monday.  nerve pain down arm and shoulder but relieved more and more since Josse massaged my shoulder.  Thought shingles were really from a leaf I squatted by up at Big Cottonwood....but six days later I talked with two drs at work and they feel it is shingles.  You can't catch shingles but can catch chicken pox from shingles if you were never vaccinated and you actually physically touch the  tiny blisters if weeping but mine havent as I have had them covered and pasting on calamine lotion.  It is the fatigue and burning pain down my arm that is ridiculous. but very improved today.   was bad yesterday.

I feel like I have mono again from when I had it in 2003....or it is the shingles? the rash is still the same maybe 30 percent decrease in brightness of blisters since a week ago monday.  Burning pain in my right arm and random areas in my rib area on right side...  the fatigue is also like when my ferritin level was 5.  Like so massively fatigued.  But I am best right when I wake up so I decided to run at 648am.  Ran scheduled run (I have been skipping a lot of these runs due to working long shifts and fatigue so I gotta get back on the schedule for the last week).  1 mile warm up and 2 x 2.5 miles at goal marathon pace.  Which at this point is like maybe 7:45 but I ran them at 6:58 first mile 6:53 second mile and 6:49 last half mile.  Felt like I was dying so opened the window rested three minutes like I was supposed to...then  started up and felt like I could not do it again.  Stood there.  Probably another three minutes and decided to do at my real goal I had for myself before braces and shingles-- 7:07 avg pace for saint george.  Ran first mile at 7:08, second mile at 7:03 and last 1/2 mile at 6:58.  Felt better but still like no way in this year was this gonna happen.  I feel so confined with these braces and weak. Like SuperMan and kryptonite.  Julie and nickel titanium falls to her death like coma fatigue.    But I was tired of my jaw not closing and locking in pain if  I tried that I had to do something rather than complain the rest of my life.  I may even need jaw surgery near the end to get my jaw better aligned. I am considered a class III orthdontic bite which if very hard to fix but can be fixed.   And braces are not freeing.  They tie me down.  So I sacrifice this running year to a good jaw in the future for the last part of my years on this earth.  Crazy but true.  My body is so stressed from the change I got shingles.  ha ha . YAY.    I must add this was done on my home treadmill which was jane's tm for many years up until a month ago.  She verified that sw on her mill is harder than at vasa gym.  PHEW!!  also I ran warmup mile in 8:30.  Cooldown in 8:53.  wiped out.  carpool as soon as I was done.  hanging with my mom.  love having her around.  :D.

west jordan park while girls at soccer training at park. ran around park at 3:15pm.  HOT, HUMID, wind.  3 mile warmup.    Ran 8 x 3 min at Marathon pace. Forgot watch.  Ran a loop that I guessed was one mile.  It was slightly over after I course tooled it.  Like 1.03.  Ha ha.  Ran at what I guessed was marathon pace and felt like death.  They were at about 6:49 pace after course tooling distance with time.  Walked the two minute rest.  Drove back to PG and ran the two mile cooldown on grass at amber's soccer practice with her team.  About 9 minute pace.   So not wanting to run Saturday. Think my goal will be 3:20 to 3:30.  Just to finish. 

ran at 6:20 am at rec center with friends. I was put on call so was able to do our marathon prep run but didn't do the MP miles.  Ran 0.27 miles (the last of her 2 miles at mp) at 6:42 pace.  Felt A TON easier than yesterday. Guess it was the humidity and heat and time of day yesterday.  Ran the last mile in 7:20. It was down hill.  This is not marathon pace either.  I am going to die Saturday.  YIKES!!!

worked.  massive fatigue.  don't want to run saturday.   but will anyway.