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Location:

Draper,UT,

Member Since:

Jun 21, 2011

Gender:

Female

Goal Type:

Other

Running Accomplishments:

800m- 2:23

1600m- 5:10

1 Mile- 5:12

3200m-11:03

XC 3 mile-17:55

XC 5k- 19:00

XC 6k- 22:25

Local 5k- 18:42

Local 10k- 41:31

Local 15k- 1:03:55

Unofficial Half (2020)- 1:45:46

Official Half (2021)- 1:49:28

60% (5 miles)- 32:32 (6:30 average)

80% (3 miles)- 18:52 (6:17 average)

16x400s- 82.0 average

20x400s- 82.6 average

SUU Road Race- 23:30 (3.9 miles/6:02 average)

Short-Term Running Goals:

Get up to 45-50 miles/week

Run a sub-19:30 5k again

Train for and race a half marathon

Long-Term Running Goals:

18:45 or under 5k

Run a marathon

Personal:

25 years old

I graduated from East High in 2015, then ran for Southern Utah University for 2.5 years. I served a mission in Independence, Missouri for the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints in 2016, right in the middle of my time at SUU. I came home early after 5 months in the mission field due to depression. I transferred to BYU-Idaho for a semester and a half, but had to drop out due to depression. I was then diagnosed with bipolar 2 disorder.

I began working full-time in May of 2020 to pay off medical bills. Starting January 2021 I took a couple classes online through SUU while working full-time to finish my Associates degree in July 2021.

January 2022 I dropped down to part-time work due to severe depression. I was in and out of the hospital 4 times in 6 months, and ended up having to quit my job entirely in July 2022 so I could go to a residential treatment center and a follow up partial hospitalization program, followed by an intensive outpatient program. I began ketamine infusions in October 2022 which have been a life changer. I also got a new job and began working part-time again in October 2022.

I no longer consider myself LDS, I left the church in February 2022. I'm figuring out my beliefs currently and I'm not sure I want to associate myself with organized religion at this time. I think I most closely align myself with secular theism. I look at my time in the LDS church and my mission and I cringe a little at how I used to be, but that's growth for you.

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Miles:This week: 0.00 Month: 0.00 Year: 71.15
Adidas Distancestar Spikes Lifetime Miles: 3.00
Adidas Boston 7 Lifetime Miles: 430.33
Nike Pegasus 34 Lifetime Miles: 493.60
Nike Pegasus 34 II Lifetime Miles: 365.31
Nike Pegasus 36 Lifetime Miles: 480.43
Nike Pegasus 36 II Lifetime Miles: 319.00
Nike Pegasus 37 Lifetime Miles: 34.05
New Balance FuelCore Nergize V1 (walking) Lifetime Miles: 170.45
Total Distance
11.25
Nike Pegasus 36 II Miles: 11.25
Night Sleep Time: 0.00Nap Time: 0.00Total Sleep Time: 0.00
Total Distance
5.25

Wasatch loop, but added in 2x400 in the middle on the flattest part of Wasatch. I was originally only going to do one but I wasn't satisfied with the first. I know 2:00 is the goal, I get competitive with myself and it's hard for me to see 2:00 as success. It automatically feels like only under 90 is success. But for these, 2:00 is the measurement. I ran 95, 86. It's surprisingly difficult to hit a 400 time on the road. Then finished the loop back home. 

I got my neuropsych results back... they were less than satisfactory. More on that later. We're meeting with the neurologist to discuss it further on Friday.

The results showed everything we suspected- a decline in memory function from my neuropsych exam 6 years ago. I scored as severely impaired on all memory tests except a recognition one, which was considered intact. I scored borderline, low average and average on language tests. Visiospacial/construction was well above average, scoring in the 90th and 91st percentile. Processing speed was mildly impaired to borderline, working memory was low average, premorbid intellect in the high average range with 75th percentile. As compared to my previous neuropsych exam, all was stable except: my ability to learn verbal information dropped from the 63rd percentile in 2014 to the 1st percentile in 2020. Delayed recall of verbal information dropped from the 75th percentile to the <1 percentile. These types of declines were present in tests of visual memory. (2014: 25th-34th percentiles, 2020: 1st percentile). Depression and anxiety seem to have improved since 2014's test (interesting).

All informative results, so why the frustration? Well, the neurologist while evaluating the data repeatedly stated I put in "poor effort, especially on memory." Then says that as such, the results aren't accurate and should be "viewed with caution." The thing is, I tried very hard on every test, including the memory ones. With his interpretation of my results, this neuropsych evaluation means nothing. It was basically a waste of time and money.

Nike Pegasus 36 II Miles: 5.25
Night Sleep Time: 0.00Nap Time: 0.00Total Sleep Time: 0.00
Comments(2)
Total Distance
3.00

So we had the meeting with the neurologist today. It was actually very informative, but ultimately doesn't change much. He agreed to amend his report to include some of the details he discussed with us and change some of the wording to properly convey his meaning. We had interpreted it differently than what he meant.

By effort, he didn't mean whether or not I applied myself. He meant I worked at a percentage of the capacity I could've due to my depression. I don't necessarily like that he's blaming all my memory problems on my depression. I feel like there's more going on than just depression- after all my memory is so bad. But I could understand how he'd come to that conclusion. Essentially I performed so terribly on a couple of tests that he can't explain why I'd scored so low. I scored lower than what those with diagnosed brain injuries would typically get. And the CT scan from March is essentially unremarkable. So his conclusion was depression.

He says I tend to underestimate how bad my depression really is. My parents agreed. My mom noted how feelig good to me was like feeling like you were drowning to someone else, probably because I have experienced worse and so it feels relatively good to be only moderately depressed. Yay for that lol

He said that most areas of my test are accurate. All except for memory. I can choose to retake the test in a year if desired, for insurance reasons. 

I wonder what this will mean for my neurology appointment in December. I might proceed with an MRI just to rule everything else out once and for all. Then focus on managing depression as the treatment for memory issues. 

Nike Pegasus 36 II Miles: 3.00
Night Sleep Time: 0.00Nap Time: 0.00Total Sleep Time: 0.00
Comments(2)
Total Distance
3.00

Out and back on Foothill. My dad might have COVID-19. He got tested this morning, we will find out tomorrow. He was showing symptoms, the main one being that he smells and tastes burning metal. I most likely don't have it seeing as I tested negative on Thursday (I get tested every week since I work on a COVID-19 testing site). But that doesn't mean I can't get it in the next few days. 

The good thing is that this is probably the best time to get it. We'll have to quarantine for a while if he gets a positive result, but I'm only supposed to work one day next week so it's not like I'm out of working a lot of hours, and with it being the holidays my sisters' activities like dance and soccer are put on hold anyways.

Nike Pegasus 36 II Miles: 3.00
Night Sleep Time: 0.00Nap Time: 0.00Total Sleep Time: 0.00
Comments(2)
Total Distance
11.25
Nike Pegasus 36 II Miles: 11.25
Night Sleep Time: 0.00Nap Time: 0.00Total Sleep Time: 0.00
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