Well it's been a solid month since I last ran. Lol.
I think I'm ready to start running again. It's just finding the time that's difficult. And the motivation. So I'm not sure if it'll be an every day thing, but I'm going to make it my goal to run at least 3 times next week.
Life update: I hit my year mark at my job on the 14th. I got a raise, and I got offered a lead position creating my own program and making it my own. I can literally do whatever I want with the clients. Hiking, snow shoeing, anything. That'll start in a couple months, they just said I have to have 45 days of perfect attendance before it can start up. Since I've had to take so much time off for health reasons. So I'm just hoping my health works with me and I can do it.
My mental health is still a struggle. I'm just surviving right now. But hey, I'm alive. Lol. I'm in an IOP program, that will end in a couple weeks. I'm gonna see if my insurance will extend it, but I'm not sure if they will. I'm also in individual therapy. And I see a psychiatrist every few weeks. I haven't been consistent with my meds the last month, so I'm feeling it.
I recently (in the last month) decided to try drinking. I think it was a bad idea honestly. I can see how it's detrimental to my health, and I just found out that people with bipolar disorder have a 60% chance of developing drinking problems. That's a fairly high percentage. If I'm being honest, I already am drinking to avoid my problems, as a distraction. Which I don't think is healthy, so I know I need to either decide to only drink with friends or not drink at all. But there is a part of me that still wants to drink. Haha. I just have to be careful.
Anyways today I had work off so I decided to go running. I was also pretty angry this morning, for no reason. But running helped clear my head. I'm not angry anymore. Lol
I'm pretty out of shape, so I expected to make it 1.5 miles at like 11 or 12 minute pace. But I surprised myself. I made it 2 miles at 9:01 pace. Granted I had to stop and walk a few times and my chest was tight and I felt like I was dying, BUT I did it haha!
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