Believe to Achieve

So far no miles. The energizer bunny has actually stopped moving I can barely type this message. I feel drugged. My body has taken a licken and frankly just can't keep on tickin' at the moment. Friday night I worked on pediatrics and took care of three infants that had different "bugs" but the same symptoms (cold/flu like). I had to gown and glove (which I did meticulously) before entering each of their rooms all night long. I was spent after this shift, I could feel the viruses floating in the air, lots of suctioning on the little ones too. Anyway top that off with having run my 15 miler that morning before the shift then returning to level 2 nursery at AFH where a baby started showing the same symptoms that I came on to and the dad walked in with a mask. Great...resistance just being shot at. My own daughter, at the help of grandpa, took her to Artic Circle and let her play on the playset (I don't let my kids do this in outbreak seasons) and her lighter cold has turned into a sess pool of drainage....and coughing. Right now all I feel is INTENSE fatigue like no muscle or tendon wants to move. I think since I didn't get sore from Friday's exhausting run the lactic acid is slowly leaking into my system and tiring me completely out. I rode my bike one mile with my littlest to drop her off at school and was like a drunk.....dizzy and light headed and out of body. So I am done today unless someway naturally I wake the heck up. I probably will call in sick for tonite if nothing changes by ill call time at 1pm. Plan for doing speedwork with Saturdays Five Miler on the Blog.

Trail run after the climb up 1100 north with Kim at 6am.  Couldn't sleep well.  Still feel very achy in head, neck, spine, fingers, wrists.  Not sore muscles but tired tendons etc... hard to explain.  This has been happening to me on and off for years and I have been diagnosed with fibromyalgia and chronic fatigue.  I pinned the cause on chemicals and fragrances.  For example if there is a plug in (candle) at the orthodontist office (like my daughter's dr. yesterday) I can't stay in the room or I would pass out in a few minutes from intense fatigue after an initial headache.  Work is hard because I have to plug up my nose to survive the chemicals used there and coworkers perfumes.  It works but I still get affected some, some times more than others.  I don't have the money to go to the environmental health center in Dallas, I  am close at times to desperation to figure this out.  I am tired of Drs.  Drs. who don't seem to care to look further instead say it is stress related here is a drug you can take.  Sure stress causes us all to be out of balance.  I just can't live in this environment like everyone else seems to.   Every strong fragrance puts me over the edge.  At Ogden I will wait on the outskirts from the crowd because usually there is too much ben-gay etc... that I can't breath well.  If anyone has heard of this problem and found answers please enlighten me.  I have been to Dr. Remington and have been on his diet (lost 23 pounds) and feel generally a lot better than I was last year at this time but today and yesterday I do not.  I feel the same overwhelming fatigue.  I rarely get a regular cold or flu I just get these weird neuromuscular symptoms.  My neurosurgeon thought for sure it was MS and that it was a matter of time for the damage to be seen.  I fight that diagnosis since noticing my chemical sensitivities.  My grandfather had MS and used to run and then was in a wheelchair.  He worked near a chemical plant.  My grandmother died of breast cancer from working with those chemicals.  Anyway... I am on the prowl.  Sorry for the long entry.  It is when I feel this badly that I contemplate the last several years...hoping I am onto something and that I will be better, normal.  

Ran with Troy for just over 2 miles then we parted so I could add on.  I ended up running 6.19.  I was told by Troy to slow down, so that was good that it felt easy when picking it up.  However I still have extreme fatigue symptoms, sinus pressure (which my ortho warned me about from the bottom braces) causing histamine release.  I can't remember if histamine release can cause fatigue.  Since benadryl is an antihistamine and people get drowsy on it so I am not sure of the answer.  Any way still intense fuzzy fatigue in the head with dizziness and muscle/tendon fatigue.  Again not sore just tired.  I will probably go in to see Dr. Remington.  It is a pattern for me to feel this way in the Spring even when I was a teenager in track by mid May I would fatigue out and couldn' t move and become extremely depressed.  I don't understand it.  Dr. Remington would have tons of ideas.  He is into wholistic healthcare.   I should probably test my adrenals--the stress gland.  Okay back to my run.  After the first mile in 9:00 I was able to wake myself up into cruise control and do the remaining 5.2 miles at 7:49 pace that is with a steep hill by AF Temple on 700 north (last mile 6:55). 1/2 mile cool down at 8:34 pace. I will only run four tomorrow real slow after I work tonite. Then try to do a good run for the Five Miler from the blog.  It depends on how messed up I get after working the next two nights.  Ran 32 miles after such schedule the end of March.....but I didn't have this much fatigue then.  So we shall see.  This is an extreme taper probably only 27 miles this week.  I think this will benefit me.  Avg pace for total mileage: 8:01.

2pm--Ran while six year old daughter road on skooter.  Did a 1.33 mile loop three times.  The second loop Amber road her bike and the third loop she toughed it out by running, stopping a few times but she did awesome and we had a good time exercising together.  1st loop 13:15 minutes, 2nd loop 12:22 and last loop 14:26- slowing it down to help my cutie, she was running for an otter pop at this point.  She was getting tired.   Avg pace for 4 miles 10:00.  Nice warm weather with a cool breeze.  Off to work I go tonight.  Last night was a good shift.  Didn't get tired until 515 am!!  Still didn't sleep well during the day.  Got about 4 okay hours and 2 get to sleep already hours.  

Excuses first. I AM TIRED. Brain tired. Like it won't shut down but needs to. After Thursday night shift I could only sleep four hours. All day felt this fuzzy headache thing and just couldn't fall asleep. Finally at 11pm I nodded off for an hour and 1/2. Got back to sleep on and off and felt crumby. Muscles okay just brain tired. So at 7am I left to pick up Melanie at the park and ride. I knew she would smoke me in this one. Longer races like the 32 miler after no sleep eventually wake me up but short distances speedy ain't happening. We got there at 720 am so we ran the gorgeous Provo River Trail, bringing back tons of memories for me as I used to live 1/2 mile from the 1.5 mile marker!!! It was beautiful scenery thankfully as truly my eyes wanted to close but I was determined to stay awake and try to tempo this run today. We ran four miles nice and easy. We got back three minutes to the race start. It started at 8am. It was out to the lake and back. This way I could cheer Melanie on. She did awesome (2nd in 31:51!!!). I on the other hand came in at 34:10. Fast enough for 3rd place but for the time standard for a cash prize for a master was 33:40. 30 seconds and I could have been paid $20 to run this tired. One more night to acclimate back to a regular sleep cycle then I believe I could have done under 33 minutes. Sasha wasn't sure of the actual lost speed but he did say it was significant cause of neuromuscular fatigue (working nights) for a woman and being over 40. Some day I will work days again. I don't even feel sore I just feel this "final leg of the Wasatch back relay feeling" after being up all night. If anyone has done the relay this is how I always feel running after night shifts these days. Pace even split at halfway mark more uphill on way back so good with this even split. 6:50 pace for five miles. Ran another 2.5 miles after the run to make that 11.5 miles total. Here's to two more night shifts then sleep, sleep sleep until Ogden!!