Believe to Achieve

nike pegasus 29.  i guess it is up to them to take me to the finish line. no time to break in any other shoe right now and my mizunos have almost 600 miles on them!!  took 1/2 and ambien that kim gave me saturday. took the other half saturday night too late (2am that it only gave me 3 hours of sleep). I took it last night at 930pm and woke at 225am-- so five hours then I tossed and turned until I got up at 515am and ran 4.5 miles before meeting up with my neighbor/friend Donna who lets me run real slow :D (9:30 to 10 pace) for three miles.  Then another 1/2 mile home.  Achilles is really angry and causing my left calf to burn as well.  I think I will have a professional massage this week.    AP today = 8:36 for 8.   Warmed up two miles and ran two at "who the heck knows" pace -- 6:40, 6:41 (hilly both miles more uphill second mile).  With the ambien on board I really felt in coma-mode and medicated so that med is out the window for being used again this week.  I just want to fall asleep without medicine!!!  And I want to sleep THROUGH the night!!!  I work the next two days-- going easy and short before work and not running one of the days.    BTW I just looked up my BIB number for the ST. George Marathon---  5084  :D.   

nike pegasus pink.   6 miles easy 8:25 pace.  First mile 9:31 :D.  Last mile 7:29.  Besides my right leg taking over my left legs role as a whiner, I feel good.  Could be because of that BIG 8 HOURS of sleep posted!!  Oh yah!! meds needed however.  Birthday bash yesterday for my 12 year old for four hours with eleven 12 year olds gave me enough anxiety.  LOTS of Drama!!  I decided that holding a birthday party for twenty 6 year olds would have been easier!!  We played 10 party games with 1st, 2nd and 3rd.  Who knew that a girl would cry for not winning????  Oh and that just made it so several of the other girls played into her emotional "game" and it just escalated from there.  It was fun but in a dramatic way.  I had to have a few "time outs" (not lecturing just animated) about who the heck cares who wins and loses skittles in a game???  We had plenty of extras to hand out later I told the girls.  OH MY!!!  my little briefing here can't even quite give you the picture!!  It seemed that half the girls were PMSing ; D.   The other half had all their ENERGY combined and I mean ENERGY!!!  (actually two girls were quite calm!!) Of course my daughter is happy so that is all that matters in the aftermath.  No one hates each other (at least I think so).  Just warning any parents thinking of a 12 year old girl party.  Perhaps limit it to 6 party guests.  

nike pegasus pink.    stop watch that can't be seen in the dark so ran until I thought I ran five miles then just barely course tooled it at 5.11 miles.  AP 8:17.  easy.  no garmin race day for sg for me.  just my stop watch that i won't be able to see in the dark for the first 5- 6 miles so running by "feel" and not really overly going to stress pace until the second half.  first half is controlled. 2nd half hopefully i can get it in gear and try to run the race but if i can't i won't and i will still be the okay : D.    sleep not so good last night.  arguments with your companion in the late afternoon cause undue anxiety even if resolved by bedtime.  felt bad that i flipped a gasket.  need to relax.   doing well now :D.   so hopefully i will sleep tonight and tomorrow night.  peaks and valleys right now when i think of my prep or lack thereof for this upcoming 26.2 miler.  lovin'my shoes.  so cush.  

ran at 11am had dr. appt with endocrinologist in the morning.  in less than two minutes he proceeded to tell me my problem was not endocrine in his sieran accent.  it was not helpful that two of the three secretaries had on the strongest perfume that immediately when I got in there i had a whopping headache and nerve pain down my arm and my nose was burning.  then to hear him (because i point out my "allergy" to perfumes first because they happen to be staring at me in the face) he says that.  I was about to tell him what I thought in a rude way....and i calmed myself enough to after further history and symptoms (wow he started to hear me) he realized why i was there seeing him.  holy flip!!!  first impressions mean a lot dude.  i really wouldn't recommend him to anyone.  dressed very nice but bedside manner very abrupt-- he seemed impatient at first until he learned my history, blotchy skin, steroids causing intense pains in my body, tan looking skin even in the winter (remember i run in the dark all the time), anxiety, insomnia, racing heart rate, leg cramps constantly-- I could see a light bulb turning on in his head.  ADRENAL insufficiency.  i have a bunch of lab work to be done and can't do them when i have something stressful coming up or it alters the test outcome.  also he is checking me for high tryptase levels linked to mast cell disease that causes me to overreact to allergens like perfume- causing intense fatigue, inability to concentrate, racing heartrate and  confusion/headaches.  Fascinating.  I honestly had to say a quick prayer when he was so abrupt at first to not lose it on him.  I told him "you are the expert, find what is wrong with me".  Gee whiz.    Obviously after "i die" at sg it won't matter (hee hee) I am really just kidding.    I just can't find out until after this stressor is gone.  So in the meantime come on let's get this marathon over already.   MY RUN---  ummmm....am I running a marathon in less than two dayS???  from all that perfume my muscles and breathing was suffering but I ran with my stop watch and just course tooled it-- thought I was at 8:30 pace but luckily it was 8:00 AP for 4.12 miles.  Now time to clean both my cars.  Yup they are an eye sore to the planet!!  Is there such a thing as "nesting" before a marathon?  I think so ; D.   last thoughts-- i really don't want to run the marathon.  just sayin'.

zero miles.  intense burning pain down right leg and right arm.  drove to sg with kim and jane.  they gave me permission to go  easy on myself with running sg  (run easy up and whatever i can do down).  was worried the burning pain would not subside but it dissipated after several meds-- celebrex, soma, 1/4 xanax and benadryl.   goal pr for sg and nothing more.  3:07 the goal.  plan-- no garmin, just stop watch that i can't read in the dark : D.    bed at 10pm.  pizza at costco with berry sundae.  so do not want to run but signed up and going for the 10 year club and wonder why since my health is not getting any better.  some day : D. 

just ran with stop watch and by feel.  couldn't see my watch until mile 6.  think at 10k I was at 43:50.  ran veyo conservatively but surprisingly as fast as last year-- i am an uphill runner :D.  don't have my splits, i got too much water on my watch that is not water resistant and the screen went blank the last mile and has yet to dry out.   i didn't even talk except once to ask the group beside me if they new if strawberry cliff shots had caffeine-- i couldn't read the small print, my up close vision has been going this past summer---Jenn Hughes was apparently right beside me and said she would read it for me but i had already tossed them aside.  i ran up veyo two to three seconds behind her.  this marathon felt like a TRAINING  run  (TIME FLEW BY) until mile 23 when the 3:05 pacer guy passed me with a herd of people and i had an anxiety attack.   i only wanted 3:07 but he was flying so fast that i thought crap i might not even get my 3:07.  and how did i forget about running with him??  i started in the elite corral and the pacers have to start after that.  i was having an out of body experience even getting to the starting line.  lack of sleep for the past four weeks was showing.  i forgot some of my gus in my bag and only ran taking ONE gu in the race and 5 gu chomps.   the cliff gus on the course all had caffeine so i had nothing else.  HENCE the last two miles of a solid WALL-- 8:30 pace for the last two miles.   I wanted to pull over and end it all.  It hit suddenly but evidently it was lack of fueling.  no leg cramps however thanks to taking three salt tabs.  I had TONS of nerve pain down my spine and both arms and down my back and to my hamstrings-- all nerve-- no muscle pain whatsoever.  AND for the first time NO blisters at SG and NO CHAFING!!!  not even a lost toe nail.  I was surprised how well i felt at mile 19 compared to last year!!!  I came in at 1:34:3x at the half and so that means a 1:33 second half.  Three minutes lost in the last two miles.  Silly me and my lack of preparation.  i don't really like to plan out my fueling.  it has been a bad habit of mine.  jane gave me the salt tabs last night.  i bought gu at the expo but lost two in my bag.   All in all i am pretty happy with my pr considering my training started mid august and my state of mind has been a real downer.  i really did not want to run today so i am just glad it is over.  met master runner speedy woman--- allydia barton who was 5 seconds ahead of me at the finish-- and in the past has run sub3 several times.  very nice.  we met on course when she offered her water bottle to me around mile 11.  she had those special bottles to pick up.  i prefer not to worry about ever having special bottles--- but i would prefer sunglasses at mile 20.  the sun's glare was working on giving me a headache.  I also had a reaction to the new tar they had just poured at mile 24 diagonal street-- the fumes made my heartrate sore and my brain became very fuzzy.  the smell was making me sick.  i saw the mile to go clock at 2:59:xx and had a hard time doing the math that should be real cut and dry.  i couldn't even figure if i had a pr or not--- but now looking at it-- if i could read my watch i would have tried a little harder for a 3:06 :D (especially seeing that 2nd and 3rd in my division were 3:06:43 and 3:07:13-- but unfortunately when i run i have no killer instinct-- i am just happy with a pr) .  I pretty much ran real slow to the finish.  i remember seeing carina pass by me and was like "hi carina" in my head but i don't know if she noticed me or not.  i was so excited to see her and have someone i know be next to me at the finish but never saw her again.  i stayed in the shower for at least 5 minutes.  she chipped me by a lot-- so cool, post baby speedstar!! :D.    next year after getting my health in order i will attempt another pr (3:06???) even though the last two miles today sucked badly that i thought of quitting.  have to make the 10 year club.  WON 100 dollars-- first utah county master :D.    not sore yet so will be interesting to see what tomorrow brings.   drove home at 6 pm with kim and jane.  they rocked sg with 2:57 each.  jane had the flu on monday and iv fluids thursday.  she thought she was dying at mile 11 and nearly passed out on the course-- -NO WATCH!!!   kim was her watch and her guardian angel.  she was badly hurting and never in her running career ever felt that crappy-- her legs cramped up at mile 18.   but still-- 6:30 pace for the last two miles!! :D.  i love it!!  they run 50 miles a week and work out at the gym with spin and are amazing to behold!! :D.