Relentless

AM - 10.2 morning practice. AC w/ Ruth. 2450 up to DI. Then AC with a larger group! I hope the kids realize they need to be there consistently after I kind of got on them last week. Taper week! It is kind of weird going in to the week of a marathon having just run 95 last week. But it needed to be done. I plan on hitting 8 tomorrow and then a massage, 7 Weds., 5 Thurs and Fri. and then the race. So I hope that will lead me to feeling fresh and ready to go. (Cumulus blue 153.25)

AM - 8 Middleton. Ran the Middleton 8 out and back with a goal of trying to hit MP for the last four (or at least as close as I could get). I still have a struggle hitting good workouts in the morning. It is hard to run faster when I am tired, its dark, I'm hungry, I'm tired! But it was a good workout and I could feel it burning a bit. Getting back, I started my carbo load for the next three days. This is something I am still trying to figure out, but I am trying 2 new carb drinks to help get it all in. (Landreth 81.95)

AM - 6.65 Green Springs w/o extension. Run was nice today. Didn't time anything, just went with the flow. (Stratus 383.65)

Got a massage last night. It felt pretty decent. I wasn't totally mush relaxed when it was done - but I really didn't know what to expect. But it did get some crazy knots out of my back and loosened up my hammies, calves, and hip flexors a lot, so that is real good.

morning - 5.2 Parkway. Got to sleep in a little (w/ just teacher meetings today and no school). Had a solid 5 miler on the Parkway. Ran MP from the top of the Parkway down and into Cottonmill E. (2 miles: 5:30, 5:50). Rolled on the downhill, and tried to keep it smooth on the flat and felt better about it toward the end. I think 2:40 is still a legit/tough goal. Last day of carbo-loading. I have eaten so much, I don't feel like eating anymore. (Startus red 277.5)

morning - 5.05 Sego Lily Loop in Sandy. Temps were very pleasant for the run. Took about 3.5 miles to work the kinks out of the legs, but once I did, I started thinking about the race and I really started to roll w/o even noticing. (Landreth 86)
Then I went to the expo and got my number. I worried that I wouldn't be registered because no one would reply to my emails, and sure enough I wasn't. But they were very helpful and took care of it no problem. Well... here we go.

I guess I'll write about my race while I can still remember it, even though I really don't feel like it.

What a mix of emotions - I still don't really know what to say/think/feel about this run even days later. I really thought 2:40 would be possible, but with the wind, I knew it would slow me a little bit. I started out trying for it anyway. James (he ran the 1/2 and hit a big PR in 1:28!) and I got to the start with plenty of time to get ready. Then got up on the line and saw everybody after a short little warm up. (splits are Garmin, not mile markers, and it measured a little long, so they don't add up perfectly.)

1-5:44 Started off about where I wanted. Felt the group out and let the leaders go away as Sasha, Matt H., and I kind of established position. I actually wanted to start a little closer to 6, and in retrospect, I should have stayed right with Adam and Kory. 2-5:50 Pretty solid start. Sasha moves up and it's basically Matt H. and I now with no one else really around. 3-6:06 A little slower up the hill and into the wind, but just fine. 4-5:22 Big downhill mile, and we just let it roll, but don't push to overwork it. 5-5:37 Continue the downhill and near the park. 6-5:58 Settled back into pace and worked with Matt through the park. I was worried about the hills (in the couple weeks back up to the race, it seemed that I had no hill strength at all) and I had to work a little to hard to stay with Matt. 7-6:08 Set back into a good rhythm and Matt and I kept switching leads in the wind. Saw Sasha up a ways and decided working together we might get to him by the end of the race. (Oh how wrong!) 8-6:24 Wind was really working me. 9-6:23 The hill up Keller Lane ruined me. Matt pulled away and I just couldn't go and I started thinking bad. 10-6:19 Trying to work the wind and keep strong. 11-6:01 A better mile because Adam caught me and I ran right behind him for the mile, trying to get my legs back. 12-6:20 Then he left me. 13-6:57 This is where I got the worst mentally in a race I have ever been (miles 13-20). I really lost any positive thoughts and the race became a nightmare on this last climb before the turn on 62nd. 14-6:17 Tried to bring it back together on the downhill, but as the time shows I just couldn't. And I watched the lead ladies just pull away. 15-6:18 It is weird. The pace was not hard to keep at all (because it was slow), but I couldn't go any faster, and it was making me SO mad and frustrated. 16-7:00 I can't repeat the thoughts that were going through my mind at this point. Ally's grandma lives right off here and I was hoping she was out so I could quit. I just wanted to walk off. She wasn't, but that didn't stop me from looking for an out. I walked through the aid station at the end here and hoped to see a van/something that would take me in. 17-6:31 Figured I just had to keep going, so I did. 18-7:11 Walked through the aid station again. Not really because I hurt or anything at all, but just because I wanted to (to be done, to quit, to never run again). 19-6:43 Started running again. Why? 20-7:30 Walked through again. And again for no reason. The 6:30 pace wasn't hurting me at all, I just was so negative walking was my only out. But then I saw that I could still get 2:50 and I just pushed the thoughts out and decided I could make something of the run. 21-6:36 Tried to just focus on the few that had passed me because of my breaks and I actually stayed the same distance with them. 22-6:28 For a moment I thought about walking again (I had each of the last three stations), but I figured why? I don't need to. 23-6:32 Staying at this pace still. I think it showed that my endurance was just fine (or had come back pretty good), but the fastness was what was really affected by the sickness (and it had not come back at all). 24-6:37 still on pace to hit that sub 2:50 and that made me feel okay. 25-6:56 dodging a lot of 1/2'ers and the little climb in town here really hit me again. 26-7:00 I am just trying to dig, but really I am pretty spent. .2 (.34 on Garmin)- 6:29 pace. Finish was a little more organized with a 1/2 and a marathon chute. I could tell I was going down about the last .1. Legs were wobbling and I couldn't breathe at all. So I did, it was fun. I weezed and tried to breathe as they gave me an inhaler thing. But the breath came back quick and I just walked out as if nothing happened. (Ohana 32.7)