This has been a rough week. Every time I think about putting it in my blog I find better things to do. My husband's aunt passed away suddenly on Monday evening. It was a massive heart attack. Obviously no one was prepared. It has been a rough week. Lots of family coming in. Lots of grieving. Lots of reminiscing about her and about my husband's parents, which is emotionally draining. Just because of timing she is being waked on Sunday night (even though we've really been doing that all week) and the funeral is Monday morning. Under different circumstances the funeral would have taken place already.
We're having Easter today. The entire family (and it's a big one) is here.
I don't really care about running right now. Maybe next week.
Yesterday I started to do my scheduled workout, but walked for 1/2 hour
right after my warm up, then ran 1.5 after that. Today I left my watch
at home and just ran in the rain. That suited my mood. And it was
actually quite nice not to worry about pace or anything. It seems so ridiculous to be worried about running right now. At first I was going to run long on Sunday, but that doesn't feel right, it being Easter and all. So instead I'm going to wake up early on Monday to run before the funeral. If I get to 16 miles, great. If not, big deal. And I'm not depressed or anything. Just sad. I keep hearing her voice (just in my head, though--I'm not crazy) saying my name or arguing loudly (as she was wont to do) about politics. One thing I feel guilty about is fighting with my husband about his trip to Arizona last week. His aunt decided to go out to AZ during the same time. Chuck's cousin Jennie (they grew up pretty much as brother and sister, and this is his aunt's daughter) told me on Thursday that it was nice that they were able to hang out together one last time, since they haven't been able to be together responsibility-free in years. And then of course everyone is still worried about Luke.
And it was hard to call my mom to let her know. They got along well and they were the same age.
| 