I'm retired from racing. Really.

10 people at frisbee. Some days you play well and lose, other days you don't play well and lose. Today was the latter. I generally played well, but my team had issues overall- we kept moving the disc well until the throw into the endzone, at which time we repeatedly threw difficult throws that weren't caught. We did this 4 times and were down 0-3. We fought back to 4-3 before losing. Too many unforced bad throws.

Having some existential thoughts today. Pretty frustrated with work- been promised a promotion for 3 or 4 years that has not emerged. My manager and his boss have repeatedly said they want to get me presenting to the boss 3 levels up, partly to help with the promotion. I was scheduled to do so again today and had worked on the presentation for a month. But, for the third time in a row, people before me took too long and they ended the meeting just as we reached my presentation. I'm very frustrated.

In addition, work is ridiculously busy right now, with way too much work and way too little time to finish it. I get to work at 7 am every day, and usually don't leave till well after 6 pm. Others work far fewer hours- some leave at 3 pm every day. And what does it get me? Nothing. The company doesn't care a whit about me. There's no recogniztion, no thanks, no extra benefits, nothing. They'll chew us up, use us up, and spit us out. What's the point, seriously. I'm just sick of all of it. They keep overloading me with projects that normally need a month, and telling me it is needed in less than a week. And I have multiple of these at the same time. It's the new normal in the past few months. I meet or exceed literally every expected deadline and metric (every measureable result of mine is well above expectation and department average despite huge volumes and the most complex projects), and it don't mean squat. I'm legitimetly close to throwing in the towel and walking away. Just tired of it. I want to feel like I'm contributing to something that is making a difference and growing, not something that is slowly dying and sucking the life out of me. Pay is decreasing, and the whole company is struggling- just take a look at the news today (GE earnings fell short of estimates, dividend cut 88%, $22 billion write down in my division, new SEC and DOJ investigations). It's a mess. The old CEO kept saying that GE has a long history and legacy for us to build on... but so did Sears, and it just went bankrupt.

AM blowing off steam to Barry so he suggested we run. 40 deg, very nice. We did about 4 miles on GE trail, both of us talking up a storm. Then he stopped and I did 5 more. Felt good all run, probably started around 8 min. Was moving 7:30's for the last while. Felt good enough to add a mile so I hit 9. Longest run since Mar 2. Wow, that's kind of sad.

65 deg and a little breezy for ultimate. 6v6. My team was misfiring on some throws- not as bad as Monday, but definitely some mistakes. In the game to 5, we scored first but someone on the other team called a foul, nullifying our goal. Then the other team scored, we turned it over on our goal line, and they scored again. After that we traded points till they won 5-3. We had our chances but couldn't pull it out. Still fun.

Left work a bit early for the holiday, spent 2 hours walking with the kids as they trick or treated. So much candy.

AM 8 miles on GE trail. Spiders seem to be gone for the year. 17 deer (most ever?) and 10 turkeys right at the end. Slow, 8:30-9:30 ish.

Lunch- it was rainy but warm (65F), and five brave/hearty/crazy people joined me for frisbee. We were very happy to get enough for a game. Scott, Dave and me vs Sam, Alex, Ty. It was a fun time with the rain going hard to soft and with some wind. A fair number of drops, partly due to the wet disc, and it makes throwing interesting, too. For the game to 5, the other team scored first and we traded points till 2-2, when my team finally broke the other team and scored into the wind. Then the other team scored into the wind, 3-3. There were some long points in here, with the wind and only 2 catchers. Then my team scored, forced a turnover in their endzone, and I ran solo (everyone else was tired) while Scott tossed a bomb to me. I was trying to track the disc over my head and stumbled twice in some of the dips in the field, almost falling. I somehow stayed on my feet and caught the winning point just in the endzone. 5-3 final. Everyone agreed it was a fun day. I dove and slid 4 or 5 times. The first time coated me in goose poop, but subsequent slides removed the poop.

Fun day.

AM 4 miles in 38 deg weather. 8-9 pace. Slow and easy. 

Found out some company news yesterday. About 1/3 of our frisbee players are in GE Renewables and are in a building about 5-10 min from the main plant. Their lease is up and they will be moving to a different building significantly futher away. TBD the impact this will have on frisbee attendance. I sure hope it doesn't kill it.