Patience; the new endurance sport.

A number of  domestic disturbances kept me awake last night until about 2:30 a.m.  I had my alarm set for 5:30 a.m and had google mapped directions to head out to the Onion Days 10K and FRB breakfast hosted by Marion.  I couldn't resist the idea of running a race for Payson Onion Days.  It felt like a cross between the Gilroy Garlic Festival (Gilroy, CA) and Coon Dog Day (Saluda, NC).  When a town has a festival named after a random vedgetable or will publically display it's quirky culturalism's, I have to go, I don't care where it is.  But I had 3 hours of sleep when the alarm went off and when it did, I could hear the rain pounding on the windows.  I did finally get out of bed at 7:30, but I was disgusted with how the day already felt wasted and mad I let myself sleep in.  So I put on my runnng gear, and waited for the rain to subside while I made all the kids (and their sleep-over friends) a huge Labor Day breakefast of omlettes with spinich and swiss cheese, broccoli and chedder, or bacon, tomatoes and avacado.  It rained and rained, and when it wouldn't stop, I went out anyway.  I was mad for missing the festivities and used the 'mad' to run pretty fast . The torrents of rain, huge rush of wind, and  blowing branches kept me alert.  My mind cleared with the wind, and I just ran fast.  I got in 4 8:15's.  Shoot, I was really looking forward to meeting everyone this morning :(

Both yesterday and today I tried to run 4 fast miles (ok, one vpb on mile 3). The whole run averaged 8:47, but I ran 4 averaging 8:36's.  I still have to fight from stopping or slowing down.  My stamina is still rebuilding. I keep telling myself, it's ok not to be back 100%.   I need to peak a month from now, not today.  I think I'll start some speed training on the treadmill to see if I can get some better consistancy.  I have no idea really how SGM will go for me at this point.  I'll just keep on keeping on (BQT or no BQT). The good news is, what is better than 63 degrees, sparkeling blue sky,and fields of Black Eyed Susan's?  Man, I wish it could stay like this forever. I love Autumn.  It's my favorite season.

Today was my first day on back treadmill since last year.  I used it to rehabilitate after I had surgery in December, but took to the road once I hooked up with Amanda in late January.  It's unerving to run in the dark on the trail.  I got the treadmill in October of  2004 for that very reason.  It's been a life-saver.  Winter a.m. running friends are harder to come by.  Easier to find the Saturday a.m. kind, harder to find the weekday a.m. kind. Unlike other years, I won't even get a couple more weeks out of daylight savings (it's in November instead of October now).  I'll try to keep to the road as much as possible before SGM, but I think once or twice a week might actually be good speed training.  Today, it felt good to force myself to run four miles without stopping at a 8:36 pace.  It feels like I'm training my cadence and building endurance.  I also secretly love the treadmill because it's the ONLY place where I get to watch TV or a movie.  So I get Netflix and order up every single movie I haven't had time to watch for the past 3 years.  Unfortunately for blogging, my entries may be more like movie reviews than running reports.....But hey, I can let you know which movies to rent.

Ok, the treadmill experience may only be as good as the movies I watch.  So I'm currently taking viewing suggestions.  I'm going more miles in less time though, because according to the treadmill, I can run pretty fast.  And while watching a movie, I can do that for like, forever. And, it sure beats trying to race the sun and the clock on School days.  I have to say though, that as an added bonus, the treadmill leaves my legs feeling worked, but fresh! To further aid in the healing of my leg, I made an appointment with Josse to perfom scraping.  Sasha said it helped heal his calf after Deseret News and so many others have raved about the healing powers of scraping.  But let's not kid around here, it hurts.  Also, after it's done, it feels great.  Thank you Josse!  Although I had to say it to her more like: Thank you?  to which she replied You're welcome?  Josse is amazing. If I even get close to BQT, we can chalk up another victory for scraping.

This weather is to die for.  So bright and blue and dry and cool.  I got to go out with Sarah this beautiful morning.  She told me all about her 5K at Onion Days.  I think there should be a 'most pregnant' prize.  That girl did it 34 minutes 8 months pregnant.  Being on this blog and meeting all you guys has been a real experience for me.  First it was the giving-up-of-the chocolate/sugar, then there was the fast running, then super-pregnant race racing, now the enthusiastic accolades of scraping.  I am out of my league. That is for sure.  I have never felt like such a wimp, ever.  I was thinking of getting an FRB shirt to run in at races just so I could find other FRB'ers.  But I'm certain that my wearing one would misrepresent the blog! (Unless I could have a caption on my shirt that said "believe it or not, I used to run even slower than this.") 

Am I the only one who can't sleep before a long run?  I think I eat too late in the day and have too many simple carbs and they keep me awake.  We ran pretty good today, stopped 3 times, but averaged 9:35's.  My lower back was fatigued a little by the end-- but not so much as a twinge out of my thigh since Josse scraped it.  I have some colorful brusing, but not even a strain below the surface.  Crazy.  We bumped into a guy on the trail who was running the Provo Marathon (boy did we pick the wrong route today).  He was taking it pretty easy so we ran with him a bit.  Today was his 99th marathon.  SG will be his 100'th.  All his adult children will be running with him and this SGM will be his 19th.  He was in his early 60's and said he started doing 5 marathons a year in his 40's.  It was really inspiring for me.  People's level of determination and dedication always astound me. I'm reminded again and again of how much more there is to do, to have, to strive, and push for.  Because of my 3 weeks of slow running to heal up that thigh thingy and get over bronchitis I have not had a recovery week and can't afford to slow down until next week.  So cheers to all those pushing some hardcore miles this week!  I'm right there with you. 

Last night someone opened up my garage door at 2:00 a.m.  (they broke into my car and took a bunch of stuff, including my garage door opener).  Lucky for us, both my dogs were right there to greet whoever opened up that garage door and I'm sure they got a really big surprize.  It was their barking WAAAY down the street that woke me up. They're good girls.  Needless to say, my run today felt slow and labored.  I guess that's to be expected since technically it would be a 'recovery' run from Saturday.  But I averaged 9 m/m without trying.  I just leaned forward and tried to keep going without stopping.  I hope to do a little speedwork T/TH. 

8:51/9:03/8:39/8:55/9:00/9:10/8:49/8:45/8:10  At some point I need to start concerning myself with time again.  I've healed up pretty nicely and now I just need to get over the mental slump and fatigue of no-recovery catch-up running.  This week is going to be tough, but if I can get through it, I stand a reasonable chance of meeting my goals for SGM.  Does anyone else get Turrett's Sydrome while running?  When I'm really trying hard, pushing against the wind, or going up hill, or battling mental fatigue, I can not stop the steady stream of insane explitives that flow through my head.  I mean I can come up with some pretty bad ones, right in a row for a minutes at a time.   I tried really hard to replace some of it with my other Mantra's.  But those thugs just kept on knocking them right off the stage today.  I just think it's funny how well I can swear in my mind and wonder why it feels so right sometimes to do so. Well, one more day of Marathon Week under my belt. Whew.

I got up in the wee hours this morning to run on the treadmill until it was light enough to go outside (6.5 miles).  Catherine and I spent a good deal of our 22 miles on Saturday talking movies and tv shows. I waxed eloquent on the existential qualities of No Country For Old Men, and had a deep discussion about the film's major themes of choice vs. fate.  I now want to read the book for better examination of those themes and character development.  She said that was too deep for a 5:00 a.m. run on the treadmill, and told me all about Alias.  I NEVER, I mean, NEVER watch tv, except Saturday Night Live, unless it's on disk.  So Catherine was kind enough to loan me the whole series.  She claims all the butt-kicking Jennifer Garner does will inspire me.  So today I started out watching the whole first episode of Alias and then hit the trail for another 6+ miles. The trail was lush, wet, post-rain fresh.  It made me remember all those mornings my Dad would drag me out of bed before junior high school to do our little 4 mile run on granite dirt roads in the hills around our house.  The dew would drip off the eucalyptus trees and drip like rain.  The moisture in the air was so thick it would condense on your arms and face. The quail and jack rabbits would scatter into the the fog as you came upon them.  As I was thinking of this,  MichelleL, Josse, and Sasha were running toward me on the trail (FRB celebrity hour!).  Michelle turned around to greet/meet me but I was shy because I was wearing my crazy treadmill get-up which includes tiny compression shorts (trust me, not attractive in the light of day).  Hi Michelle! I am now fully dressed!......  Anyway, what a beautiful morning. 

I really thought today would be terrible.  Saturday's run was especially hard because my midweek run had not been long enough to physically prepare me for 22 miles.  So I was pretty beat afterward and a little sore in the hips/hamstrings.  Then Monday was like mud, Tuesday I did a little better and tried to push a few 200 Meter's a long the way and yesterday's mileage was fine.  Except the rest of the day, my legs and lower back were so tired!! Every time I got up, sat down, moved, I felt them fatigued and lheavy.  But last night, I got excellent sleep, waited until noon to run to put more hours between runs, and I had an amazing run!  You hope for a day like today on a race day.  Everything comes together at one time-- the rest, the training, the mental strength.  I guess, also, it felt like cake because it was only 6 miles.  But it was a decent, relaxed effort and I averaged 8:40.  It hasn't felt this good since July. Man, every day is different.  But sleep and recovery play a huge role.

I love Fridays.  No pressure, pure 'ice-cream & cake' miles.  I missed running with Sarah this morning. But she's busy at home finishing up the baby for his scheduled October debut.  I'll miss our Friday runs, but maybe we can play again sometime in late Winter.  So, my kids were out of school and I got to have my beloved morning hours to myself  while they slept in.  I was joyous as I went out the door but unprepared, however, for how cold it was.  By mile 2, I couldn't work my fingers or bend my wrists.  (Trying to blow your nose or manouever a VDP with CLAWS instead of fingers is tricky!). I did 4 quick miles, then I had to run inside and try to dial the phone (with those same claws) to make a quick phone call to KSL radio for work. Then I ran back outside for another 2 miles.  The cool humidity of the morning reminded me of the Mt. Hood area in Oregon.  It's cold like this in that mountain air, even in the summer.  I thought of it this morning because of my hands.  Every time I try to run in Mt. Hood, I'm always tempted to eat the black and rasberries that grow along the road, but the CLAWS make it hard.  I'm gearing up for 24 tommorrow.  Wish me luck.  I'm pooped.

I have had 4 long runs in a row building up from 17.  We all know this is a  bad idea.  It's especially bad when you are over 40, let me tell you.  It is also a bad idea to run two 22/23 mile runs on consecutive Saturdays. But I needed today's run to be the closest to 26 I could muster.  I'm not gonna lie, it was hard--as was the 13 miler on Wedensday.  I'm out of gas--just in time to start to take it down a notch.  Yay!  We met a guy on the trail this morning who ran with us for a bit who was visiting from Providence RI.  Since I spent a week there this summer I had a fun time asking him how he likes living there, what he was doing back here, etc.  He works for Coopers & Lybrand and is back at BYU recruiting fresh blood from the MAC program.  He also said he was training for the Breakers Marathon in Newport RI, one I've been dreaming of trying for 3 years.  From what I know of Newport, it looks to be a beautiful course, by the beach, by the mansions. Lucky guy, I wish I was a successful  fresh MAC grad looking for a job on the East Coast.... My greatest motivation to qualify for Boston is just to have a good excuse to BE there for a week next Spring.  I told him about the blog and said I'd look for him to blog there to see how the Beakers went.....I will be utterly useless the rest of today.  Days like today are when running feels most selfish --when it interferes in the hours of a Saturday that I should be running around with my Kids.  But I guess it's also good to give them a good example of how to perserver and keep goals.  I guess we'll know by way of admission, in some family group therapy session scheduled, oh, about 10 years from today :)

My friend Marisa is running her first marathon (Top of Utah) this Saturday.  When I saw her yesterday at a friend's house, she said she was nervous.  At Hobble Creek she came in 12th (I think) in her age division. She runs 7:30's with some ease and will probably finish in 3 hours if she's on her game.  I'm excited for her and hope she has a good experience in Logan.  She asked me yesterday about ice baths.  I hardly ever mention them here, but I do take them.  It's just that I never have to make one up in the tub because I live on the river.  When I feel like I need one at the end of a run, I take off my shoes and sit in my running clothes on a special flat piece of concrete that is along the river's edge.  The retired folk always call down the bank to ask if I need help. Today, I was sitting waist deep on my mossy concrete slab thinking about how the pampa grass was turning yellow and dry along the trail and contemplating the end of summer.  There was a warm mellow sunlight twinkeling down thorugh the tree branches.  I was dreaming of all those lovely desert miles in St. George and hoping this year will be half as good as last year.  I know there are more intersting places to live and run (Oregon/Washington come to mind), but I have lived here for  17 years now and I never get tired of what Utah has to offer.

 Good luck Marisa!  I'll be thinking of you this week.  You're going to fly!

I am so disgusted with my run today I don't even want to blog about it.  I am overwhelmed with negative thoughts in this moment.  So I think I'll skip it.  At least the weather is clear and beautiful.  And my overall health is good enough to be outside doing something physical in comfortable weather. I can, I can, I can, can, can-- maybe not today though.

I'm not sure if running on the treadmill counts as real running or not.  But I feel like my legs and lower back need a break.  They are not injured or in real pain, as much as fatigued.  I've been bouncing back fairly well from the long runs-- that is until this one on Saturday.  It did me in.  I took it easy on Monday, but had such a terrible run yesterday, I settled on the treadmill today hoping it will leave me feeling fresh.  Josse told me that it uses different muscles and changes your gait --which right now may be a good thing.  But I do like  forcing myself into/holding a specific pace.  I remembered today that for me, I always peak 2 months into training. I remembered how in Cross Country,  I  had to be careful that my level of fitness/training peaked around the same time as regionals/state.  One year, I was so excited for the season, I started training early, and peaked mid-season and ended with shin splints. But that was almost 25 years ago and I've forgotten about all that.  I probably shouldn't have tried to so hard this summer and should have focused on peaking in October.  I just took for granted that I'd get better, and better.  But hey, I did get a gold medal on Pioneer Day! I may not win anything again until, by process of elimination I take the 80-85 age division by storm. 

I spent a lot of time whining out loud as I tried to keep an 8:36 m/m pace (a 7 setting) for 5 straight miles.  I jumped onto the the sides of the treadmill (10second at a time to catchmybreath) more times than I'd like to admit here.  And, I sure sweat up a crazy storm.  Isn't that a pretty image?  An out of breath, sweaty mess, crying on the treadmill. I'm a true champion.  Scraping anyone?  Geeze, I am such a baby.   But hey, on the bright side, I felt I got a really good work out without all the impact.  So that part feels good. Tommorrow I think I'll hit the ground  and see what I can do for a few miles. But I'm focusing on a great 14 miles on Saturday.  I have to say, the treadmill has made a big difference to my overall level of fatigue....and then I noticed the tiny tear in the belt.  If that thing tears before Oct. 4th I'm going ballistic. 

I don't know what's with the sleeping.  Sometimes it just doesn't come.  I had no time today at all, and so I did this  run as quick as I could.  My shirt kept brushing my Garmin and I forgot to lock the bezel, so it kept shutting it off.  Why does that always happen when I'm making record time on a run!  Happy Friday!  Can't wait for "ONLY" 14 miles tommorrow!

At least I slept well, but both Catherine and I were still feeling wobbely and stiff every time we had to stop (drink, tie shoes, etc).  I really hope my legs get back to feeling as strong as they did before all the abductor, hip flexor, hamstring, hip and psychdrama began.  But running 14 today, despite the effort it took, felt pretty strong.  It's nice not to have to 'recover' from a Saturday run.  It's been too many Saturdays in a row running hard.  So right now I'm feeling fresh as a daisy.  Keep it coming.

The lowered mileage from last week, and better sleep in the past few days has helped a lot.  I feel that I have regained muscle strenth and stamina over the past week-- I have to admit though, that I think it's also because I've gone back to eating meat more frequently.  I'll go back to the vedgetable proteins and eggs after the marathon, or when I can more evely space out my 50 miles a week and I'm not trying to run fast or hard (I'm sorry Lucia, I hate reporting this knowing how dissapointed you'll be in me....).  The Good news is, I am running 8:13-8:30's with greater regularity again. I've been waiting to announce this until I felt it was not an anomoly.  Also, my natural gait finally came back to me!  I've been trying to find it again since my abductor and hipflexor went haywire. I've got to remember, it's about not lifting my feet so high off the ground, and moving them faster with a flat footed landing and push off. Occassionally I'll mid-foot it to get in some quick steps and change the impact for a bit.  Today's splits:   8:27/8:13/8:23/8:40/8:20/8:17/8:33 This was the best run I've had since August 4th (well, besides the miles and miles of 8:36's on the treadmill, which doesn't feel like real running). Yay!  I'm thinking that my strategy for SG will be to take the beginning and the hill's easy, and to really let it out on the downhill portions.  I'm still doubtful I can take 15 minutes off my last year's run--actually, now that I think about it, if I just don't have to stop and stand in line for the bathroom twice (like I did last year) it might cut almost 10 mintues righ there.  Can you tell, I'm getting excited?

My vastus medialis (inner quad) felt a little twingey as my foot hit the pavement this morning.  I literally broke into a cold sweat (panic) that it was starting up again.  So I started out really slowly, stretched thouroughly once warm, and then kept on running (slowly I thought). Then my mind wandered for a good while and when I finally looked down, I had run 4 miles at an average pace of 8:36. I'm not trying to aggravate my leg, I'm not.  I'm not even trying to run faster, it's just happening.  A friend who'd just  been in Bolivia and Chile for two weeks phoned right in the middle of my run. I was excited to hear about the trip, so  I ran back home as quick as I could to call back and hear all about what happened in Boliva (while he was there the peace corps and missionaries alike fled the country). I wanted to keep it easy today, but I was also in a hurry.  So I compensated for the faster running by sitting in the river for about 10 minutes.  It was a chilly morning, so I got a lot of strange looks.  Then I drove to Salt Lake with an ice pack on my leg just for good measure.  Now I've been chilled to the bone for over an hour.  But hey, whatever it takes to keep that under control.  

I'm ammending a portion of my blog because I want to remind myself what Bonnie wrote me today in an effort to help get me to race day un-injured (run slower and easier on easy days-- especially these days).  Both Josse and Sasha have told me the same thing at other times.  I just forget. She reminded me that the hay is already in the barn aleady and shared her mantra which I thought should be public, if she has not already made it so: "Step 1: get to the starting line healthy.  Step 2: run as fast as the day and conditions allow.  Without 1, there is no 2! 

Thanks Bonnie!  I needed the reminder-- maybe anyone reading this needs it too!

I was compelled last night to re-read The Great Gatsby late into the night, and then lay there thinking about excess, obsession, self-control, and delayed gratification. Hmm. That's ironic now that I think about it. Then, I woke up with a blinding mirgane, and hives. Most people get regular allergies that make them sneeze and cry. Once a year, I get allergies too. Only, I get mirganes and itchy, itchy, ITCHY SKIN. The itching is positively maddening. So I took an Alavert and stayed inside on the treadmill where I didn't need to see my periforial surroundings (remember that migrane?). Also, I knew I could trust the machine to help me maintain a slower pace at 9:45. It was my way of showing how much I love and care for my my Vastus Medialis. By the time I was done, I was mostly over the itching. And, even though Alavert says it is non-drowsy, it is not. Now I'm sleepy with a headache, but my legs sure feel nice.

I needed to balance out the up-all-night-reading and then contemplating the "Great American Dilemma" by running (7 miles) on the treadmill and watching the last season of The Office. See how I'm trying to rest my body and mind? See how I am showing my appreciation for their cooperation and patience in the past few months. Let the tapering begin in earnest. Hey, anyone know what carb depletion is? It just doesn't sound good, but is it important? I'm headed to the discussion board next, but feel free to share knowlege of pre-marathon eating and hydrating!

P.M.-- (3 miles) After chatting with Josse about carbohydrates and scraping, I suggested she take a nice easy little autumn run by the river to get her spirits up after being sick.  I held that delicious little thought for like an hour, and then couldn't stand it any longer and did just that!  Such a beautiful, cool, autumn afternoon, so golden and mellow. The river so still, the air so perfect, the sky so blue, the mountains so grand and strong.  The treadmill is nice, but it just doesn't feed your soul the way being outside does.  Now I'm ready to taper. I promise.

What is better than a Friday morning run along the rivertrail.  I never, ever get tired of it, the cycles of it, the comfortable beauty of it.  I'm not sad to say goodbye to summer. I love Autumn.  It's like eating the frosting off the cupcake and chucking the rest in the trash. Pure perfection and exactly what you wanted in the first place.  What compares to the mellowed light, and cooler air?  The fading leaves, the dry alfalfa fields?  The roadside brown eyed susans and silkeweed? The lake's surface is still blue glass reflecting back the Ochre Mountains?  It's such a short moment of the year we get to enjoy the outside world the way it's meant to be.  This is why we run all year long.  To eventually witness, and bathe in the gentleness of the world on a morning like this. Forget the marathon, forget the races, forget everything and just melt into and accept the changing season.

Catherine and I did our last Saturday training in the canyon together.  It was a gorgeous morning. The trees are unbelievable this year, so much red and orange.  We wondered where all the regulars went, the trail was pretty empty considering the time of year.  We had a fantastic run, both up and down the canyon easy breezy 8:40's.  It's been a while since I even made plans to do fun stuff on a Saturday in anticipation of recovering from hard, long runs.  But after running, I saw Josse who worked her magic on my legs, went to the farmer's market and ate a bushel of fresh nectarines by myself (plus a couple of tamales with the kids), and fitted my kids for their skis.  Oh the canyon, oh the famer's market, oh the excitement for SG!   I love this time of year.  Now, I'm going to the lovely warm shade of my backyard to read a book and maybe take a nap on the hammock while kids play out front with their friends.  Did I say how much I love this time of year?

It's hard to sleep when you're not completely exhausted.  That's what I've decided.  I've also decided that white sugar is pure evil.  I think I'm really past it now for good.  I ate some candy corn yesterday without really thinking about it.  I brushed it off as harmless, and then as an afterthought, read the ingredients.  It had, not just sugar and corn syrup as I expected, but partially hydrogenated palm/cottonseed oil.  And then, that was all I could think about.  This morning --even if it was psychological--I felt gross for like two miles into my run.  It felt like a nice easy run, and I was going without my Garmin.  But then I bumped into Sasha who said I was going too fast.  It would be good to have more control of my running -- run a harder, faster sustained distance, and keep it cool on days when I should be taking it easy.  I'm just so undisciplined at heart.  It's dissapointing to find these things out about youself, right before a big race.  I just only ever run according to how I feel and how I feel about the weather.  Sasha said he was only feeling OK right now. But that's probably because he just ran the Top of Utah last week (10 times in a row I might add, placing 1st twice and averaging 2:34 over a 10 year span).  It was really good to catch up with Sasha this morning and get a little shot in the arm.  I can't wait to meet other bloggers in SG on Friday.  I hope we all have a good week and a great race.  It's supposed to be 90 degrees.  I guess that's good motivation for GETTING IT OVER WITH fast!

Yep, these little runs are enough to drive you crazy.  Just enough time to worry about every stiff joint and twitch, and then when you're finally warmed up, it's time to stop.  Also, don't forget to keep it slow! NO, even SLOWER. My body's in a warp, wanting to consume more calories than I'm going to burn this week (out of habit for how many calories I usually burn in a week).  I'd like to not gain another 3 pounds by Saturday.  I keep thinking about Clyde talking about eating more sensibly this week, and Adam's & Josse's advice to avoid the carb depletion.  All I know is that I want to eat a side of beef and a bowl of cereal for breakfast today.   Anyway, I am excited for Saturday (aside from the effort it takes to 'sleep' on Friday night and then load a buss at 4:00 a.m.).  I love that I just get to run and run and run for a long time and have a really good excuse for being all by myself in the desert enjoying the sound of breathing and feet hitting the pavement all around me.  Last year, Duane, Jeff, Diana and I waited 9 mintues to cross the starting line.  It was a actually a good strategy, we didn't have to trip over people in the dark at the start and elbow our way to a good space and pace.  I'm trying to ready my mind for those last 2 miles I hate so much.