Believe to Achieve

Decided to TORCHER myself by putting on my tried and TRUE socks (with holes) and just HAD to go for a run.  AHHHHHH did they feel like ME.  Seriously I am the biggest idiot I know to change to a different brand of socks on race day.  Ran around the neighborhood on the trail by the mobile home my in-laws own in St. George.  AP slow of course 48 hours post marathon---9:25.    I just had to run 2.62 miles to add to the torcher. 

nothing.  I got up like normal people do before work and didn't run in the wee hours.  I think I thought I was going to like die after my sub three marathon.....because now I am depressed as I look around at the remnants of my summer affair with running madness and say to myself "what was it all for?"  as the years pass by and I just keep getting older and not younger....blah,  I am like "who am I really?".  All the fun times this summer crazily running miles-- 4 marathons in less than four months.  Started and ended with PRs.  Some moments I would like to capture in time forever-- running up Sogonamit marathon with Kelli being one and running down TOU marathon with Risa and Nickie the other.  I also think I have an anxiety disorder.  Overstimulated in crowds so the small town races  I am more myself.  I don't even think I focused much on the race during the race until  I realize we were in a race and no one really talked much anymore.  I so loved running with Jane up Veyo.  I ran from running partner to running partner chatting up a storm with many a friend along the way.  That is what running is about to me.  This racing thing is a drag.  No time to chat and laugh and pee.  No worries  I will redeem myself but I honesly do not have a great self image at the moment.  Those marathon photos are absolutely hideous.   Not sure when I will be back for my surprise ending but sometime between now and when I am fifty.  : D.    My analogy for the marathon for me last Saturday:  It was like at one point I was floating down stream merrily along seeing all my good running friends along the way and suddenly a current pulled me and others back and others caught the waves and moved forward swiftly.  I got a lot of debris in my eyes and could no longer see clearly and then out of no where Kelli appears, then Tyler and then Lily--- friends once more in the marathon river to the finish line.  It has been a great year with many a running friend along the way.  No matter how we got there we all ended and started  in the same place, just as in life itself, : D.

8.2 very slow miles all about the same pace, no variation really-- AP 9:07.  It was cold, windy and snowed an hour after my run.  Seriously!!!  But time to take care of myself. Renewed hope.  Apparently my ferritn level is lower than last year and that I was near death in the marathon for a good reason.  I fit all the symptoms I am about to post from a site on the internet.  Ferritin carries iron which carries hemoglobin to your tissues (oxygen).  Ferritn level is directly related to iron level in the body.  Since I was bleeding for over three weeks from the end of August to the week before the marathon I was not ready for my further running (heel strike hemolysis) to take me under and spit me out.  I am TEXTBOOK to what happened.  I can't tell you how much pain ALL of my muscles were in during the marathon.  You can tell by my picture taken by the photographers in the marathon.  It was excruciating.  I was in oxygen deprivation in a big way.  I was SOOOOOO SORE all over the top half of my body after the race and for three days later like I had run that marathon ONLY with my upper body but really it was the lack of hemogobin to my muscles and chest and heart (myoglobin).  Here is part of the article.  (YUP more IV iron therapy for me.  I can be REBUILT : D).    Even this run was hard for me.  Same as last year.  That is why I had to run super slow for me with absolutlely no picking it up.  My pelvis is ailing and feeling like it is going to crumble again.  As soon as I was transfused all these symptoms went away.  Alleluyah!! 

Overview

Ferritin, a protein in the body, stores iron and releases it when needed, and acts as a mediator and a transporter for iron. The amount of ferritin in the body is directly related to the amount of iron in the body. Ferritin works harder in the body when threatened with infection, stress and cancer. However, ferritin levels can decrease if the body bleeds. This is because iron attaches to blood. Side effects result with low ferritin levels.

Low Oxygen Levels

Low ferritin levels correlate with low iron levels in the blood. Iron carries oxygen via the red blood cells. When iron levels drop, less oxygen travels through the body. Initially, you will experience shortness of breath, perspiration and fatigue. Prolonged oxygen deprivation results in difficulty catching your breath and fainting. The skin becomes pale and the heart and lungs will be affected. This can be a life-threatening event.

The first three miles were so very slow.  Breathing labored especially in the cold air.  Actually wore my black tights, head band, two shirts and gloves.  Pelvis to hamstrings ailing--- shooting nerve pains.  Again, this all went away as soon as I was transfused.  I am gathering again my breathing pattern will improve.   Have to run slow so  I don't tax myself more plus it just doesn't feel good to run fast.  I seem to be lacking adrenaline as well.  Still feeling quite depressed but I read that low iron causes depression as well.  It seems to be linked to many problems in the body.  I found lots of good articles on what to eat and what not to eat to get levels up but in my case it is so low that it would take months and inactivity to increase my level without IV infusion.  I feel so stupid that I didn't just go to the Dr.  I really don't like visiting the Dr.  There is quite the story for that too but I will leave that to the grave or best selling book in the future  : D.    AP after miles 1, 2 and 3 at 9:26, 9:32, 9:14  =  8:48.  I can't believe there is so much snow on the mountains again.  Didn't it just finish melting?  and so low to us!!!!!!  YOU COULD FEEL THE FREEZER BURN from it. 

Called at 430 am to tell me I was being pulled to Orem Hospital.  Two minutes later called to tell I was going to Utah Valley Hospital on Peds (because another nurse wasn't trained there).  Then when I got to peds I was sent to NICU.  Yay!!  Since I worked there last week and for 17 years it was nice.  HOWEVER I was super tired and could not fall back to sleep.  I lost 50 minutes of sleep with this call.   So I rolled out bed and decided to run.  All bundled except a hat I got outside in the rain.  Drizzled cold rain the entire run.  Got in 4.2 miles at 8:42.  My pelvis ached after the run and I never had this problem but just before the SGM, like the week before I started getting plantar fasc. symtoms.  Totally  bugging me now.  Started to rub my calf like crazy and it is letting up.  Went to the BYU football game at 8:15pm last night (left at 7pm with all my family).  Got additional 6 tickets for free.  Stayed until 1030pm then drove home with Amber, my littlest.   Got in bed at 1115pm.  Now off to work at American Fork hospital where I usually work : D.   Still depressed about running.  Not feeling too well on my runs physically/mentally.  Still feel a lack of adrenaline and I guess iron.  Although I am surre I am just finding excuses for my lack of performance.