Believe to Achieve

Well not the way I wanted today or yesterday to go for that matter.  Chiro appt went really well yesterday. First time pain free in my legs in a long time-- lots of adusting and stretch table/massage/heat/ultrasound to the lower back.  Lovin' it.  THEN--- after 2 hours of shopping with my husband and youngest daughter,we got back home to our dog yelping at anything that went by him.   I had my husband hold him down (he is only 10 pounds) because by process of elimination he had something hurting in his mouth.  I found a broken tooth.  Amber had given him a chew stick and his teeth have a lot of tartar (his breed brews tartar, dang it!!).  Well I pulled it out but left some root and he continued to yelp an hour later. Stupid me, without the aid of my husband who was busy at the time, I tried to check his teeth again and HE BIT my thumb!!!! OUCCCCHHHHHH!!!  I freaked out and screamed from the pain and my thumb was first in shock then it began to bleed all over.  I was so angry and I had to be at a staff meeting in 20 minutes.  While I was at staff meeting my husband took him to the vet.  My dog also has another tooth that is broken.  Our dog has a teeth cleaning and tooth extraction appt on Friday.  He got a shot for pain and an antibiotic shot.  He just barely yelped as I typed this.  It is going to cost us over 300 dollars!!!!  Plus another 100 dollars for last nights visit.  We chose a different hospital as Timponogos Animal hospital quoted us over 700 dollars to 900 dollars depending on what they find when they get in there!!! HOLY FLIP!!  I stressed out and am still stressed out.  I love my dog and I don't want him in pain so of course we are going to get him so help. I just can't take all the expenses this year!!     My plan today was to run a 3 mile time trial.  I had a hard time sleeping from the stress and the pain in my thumb.  I had to take Courtney over to where she would leave for YW camp at 9am and still I watched the hours go by for a cooler morning run.   I didn't get out until  1130am!!   I was so hot running.  There was a breeze and I wanted to just give up on the the time trial but I ran to the AF track anyway.  I went inside the school and used the bathroom and put water on my head.  I wore my visor.  I tried to feel motivated.  My leg went numb this morning when I got up and my ankle started to tingle again (my back problem still not going away).  Running at first felt off but I just couldn't not run.  I didn't run with my garmin and used my stopwatch for my entire run.  It took me 21 minutes to get there.  I course tooled it and it was 2.43 miles.  I then ran two warmup miles (as if I needed to warm up in this seering heat) around the track.  I took to swigs of my water I carried there and I was off.  Afte the first two laps I wanted to be done.   This whole run I was mentally battling the heat.  I wanted to stop after each turn.  I just couldn't get past wanting to stop.  Hence the complete breakdown in the pace.   I am telling you it was very hot.  Oh I had a head wind when I would turned south.  I actually was thankful for it.  It helped remove some stench but once I ran around the corner out of the wind-- stale humid sun beating down heat.  Why the heck am I running out here in the heat? I detest the heat.  This is not going to be pretty.  In fact I was so delirious at the end that  I couldn't figure out my watch to find my splits and eventually I accidentally erased them (my thumb was hurting pressing the numbers, I was handicapped!!) I do remember a few of them--  they went like this for the first four laps-- 1:33 (oh yah looking good), 1:37, 1:37, 1:38(first mile at 6:25, not too bad I suppose) then I just got worse.  I wasn't out of breath I was just so DARN hot, dripping beads of sweat.  At mile two I was at 13:14 (so my 6:25 mile turned to a 6:37.5 average pace-- that means this mile was a 6:49, how pathetic is that!!).  I kept telling myself "okay you can stop after 6 laps, okay try to go to 8 laps.  Alright Julie just do four easy laps the pace doesn't matter."  My mind was the issue.  I was under too much stress to run decently today but I had to get it done.  My last mile was 1:44, 1:45, 1:45, 1:40 from what I can remember.  6:54!!!!  so ridiculous.  It wasn't like I was giving it my all I was AGAIN too darn hot!!!  Overall time 20:09.  AP 6:42.  Stopwatch time.  I quickly walked over to the shade and put my head between my legs then walked in to the school.  AC on in there.  I had to pee really badly the last 5 laps.  I drank a lot of water before this run and apparently my kidneys kicked it in gear just before (when I pottied) and during.  I almost peed my pants after the run!!!  My muscles were twitching all over in my face and legs.  I am sure I was salt depleted as all I drank was water.  I am not really smart today.  Ran home easy after two cooldown laps around the track.