For Whom the Dogs Bark

So today I visited the good Dr. Kevorkian, whom they call "Dr. K" around his office, which seems like a great compromise to me.  He is 67 years old, skinny as a rail, friendly and talkative, and quite knowledgeable about running.  I was in so much pain this morning that my wife had to drive me.  It was weird walking into an empty reception room, kind of like being the only occupied table in a restaurant -- makes you feel like you didn't get the memo.  He was assisted by a Baylor medical student and a doctor from Romania.  The gown was inadequate, but other than that everything went well.  He let me talk and talk, I told him my whole sordid history.  (OK, I left out the Ogden Marathon, he didn't need to know everything.)  The high points are as follows:

• I cannot run until running creates absolutely no pain.  Running of course compresses the back and irritates the injury.  Makes sense.  I can walk all I want, and do elliptical and other instruments of mental torture, so long as they don't create pain.
• I have to go through 4 weeks of physical therapy, whereupon I will report back to his offices.
• Pain meds are very simple, an Ibuprofen prescription that is 4x counter strength.  (I know I can buy it and do it myself, but the prescription is only $4.)
• Strengthening my back muscles will help my condition, not necessarily cure it.
• The MRI I gave him from last summer was mildly interesting to him, but he said half the adult population has herniated disks to some degree, just not a big deal.
• Definitely nerve damage on the right side from my first back injury 4 years ago.  He was able to isolate certain areas related to S1 that have less feeling on the right side than the left.
• Hams are tight as a bow string, hips are loose.
• My future as a runner is uncertain.  This is a serious injury but not necessarily the end.  We will re-evaluate on March 19.

Some takeaways:

1. This is not the same injury as last summer.  That was a piriformis pinching the nerve that goes through it.  My hips are still loose because I have been doing the proper stretching for that.  This is a plain-vanilla old-man strained back.  I think that is a good sign.
2. Doing the right back and other core exercises may help more than Dr. K. realizes.  The reason I have these injuries, I think, is because certain muscles (hams and glutes mainly) become stronger than the muscles further up the chain (back and abs currently).  Once I fix that, I should be in pretty good shape, though it now appears cerrtain that I will never be 30 again.
3. I have a pool-free back yard.  It might be time to change that.
4. Boston 2013 is history. I'm about to cancel my hotel room, so if anybody needs one let me know.

Excuse me, it's time for my nap.