So we got to the track around lunchtime. I watched a few prelims and then went and hammocked with Tori under the bleachers to get out of the sun for a while so I wouldn't be drained. At 2nd call, I checked in for the 1600, warmed up, then hung out under the check-in tent with most of the other milers. My adrenaline was pumping like crazy just talking to all of these girls that I have researched like crazy on MileSplit.
So anyways we finally made our way to the line. There were cameras absolutely everywhere - at least 6 or 7 professional photographers taking pictures and then 1 or 2 guys with those big video cameras that hooked up to the Jumbotron so everyone could see us up close. The mile is definitely a crowd favorite. That was all really overwhelming for me and definitely messed up my focus a little bit. So the gun goes off and we went out pretty fast. The lead girls left immediately and I hung back in my middle pack. First lap was 1:17, and everything stayed the same, then 800m split was 2:42 I think. At this point my legs were feeling so heavy and my mindset started to go downhill. I started thinking about how I still had to do the 2 mile after this, and wondering if I would ever forgive myself if I just gave up and didn't even run it. Needless to say, my 3rd lap was terrible with a 1:28 split. Last lap was a little bit better just because I wanted to be done so bad. I came through at a 5:39, 8 seconds slower than my 5:31 PR from last Saturday, in 9th place (granted, 1 ahead of my 10th place ranking) with no one really near me to challenge me at the end. That isn't an awful time, but seeing as I was dying so bad all season to break into the 5:20's...it was a little (aka, very) disheartening for me that this was my last chance and not only did I not get it, I backtracked.
I changed back into my trainers, took my recovery shake, and went on a short cool down to get some of my lactic acid out. This was my first year doing indoor track, so it was the first year that I ever literally ran all year long...my legs were on the brink of exhaustion and my mind was even worse off, I was driving myself crazy pushing so hard for so long. I started thinking about the 3200m coming up and I broke down. I pulled off during my cool down into a dugout in the softball field behind the stadium and just prayed. I asked God to just take this race from me and do with it what He would. I realized that God is not impressed with my times and his love for me is not reliant on whether I PR or not.
Hung out with my family, Tori, and Joseph for a little while and watched some hurdles and sprints. Then I went and warmed back up for the 2 mile and checked in. I felt really strange when the gun went off. Usually I have a gameplan, a strategy, a list of splits that I am trying to hit. But this time I felt totally unprepared, I didn't have anything. I was just running. First lap was 1:20. For the whole first mile, I was in 9th just drafting off of these two girls right in front of me who were battling back and forth. I felt like I was cruising, but somehow I was hitting my fastest splits all season. First mile was 5:59-6 flat. Right after the mile, I went ahead and pretty easily passed the two girls in front of me and moved into 7th. I thought a good bit about my prayer during the next two laps and that gave me a lot of strength. I was hurting but I knew it would pass eventually. My last lap was really strong, and really sentimental. Every hundred meters, I kept thinking, "This is my last ___ hundred meters of my high school career..." I couldn't breathe anymore at that point, but my legs were feeling so much better than in my mile, and I tried my best to just bust it till the end and finish on empty. My parents said my last 200m was the best kick they ever saw me have. I saw the clock as I came through the line and knew I had PR'd by at least a second, which would be a season best by at least 5 seconds. As I slowed, I smiled, then stumbled into the grass and collapsed. Right as I hit the ground, the rain came down and they announced that we needed to evacuate the stadium, but I was still just trying to breathe well again. Well apparently it was hail and thunder, but I was so gone I don't even remember that. Pretty cool though that that storm held off until right after I finished.
Officially I ran a 12:12.31 and placed 7th, one ahead of my ranking. It's incredibly bittersweet. I don't really know what to think about the race or the meet itself, but I am so thankful for how God worked through me and how he used this meet to teach me to trust in him and not myself. I also just can't believe that I am done with high school running forever. That was it. That being said, I am beyond excited to be a Terrier and I know I will soon break 5:30 and 12 flat with ease once I am training collegiately. I'm so pumped for all that is in store for me at Wofford, because as I look back on my 4 years running here at Smoky, I never would have imagined how blessed I would be. And yet....the best is yet to come.
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