Getting back to Boston

I'm definitely a believer in the therapeutic value of running after today.

Finally got back out after 10 days off for illness and weather. Didn't feel completely back to normal physically, but I needed to get out. I needed endorphins. I was really down, blah, pretty much depressed this morning. Having thoughts I really don't want to be having. So around noon I laced 'em up and went out. It's warm enough, in the 40s anyway, that the cold air was not a problem. I think I coughed once in the run. Legs felt a little sluggish, which I expected after 10 days on the shelf, but got through at a reasonable pace. I wore the heart rate monitor out of curiosity, just to see what the HR was after so much inactivity. Looks like it was in the 130s early, got up into the 150s later on as the miles and a few hills went by. Not great, but not too surprising.

I'm still not really "up" after the run, but I'm better. I feel somewhat human again. I think I needed this run bigtime.

Legs sore from last night, so started slowly -- very slowly, like > 11:00. Gradually sped up, but overall pace didn't dip below 10:00 until the last mile. Ran three big loops around JBH, then went out the back and down Cheyenne and Camino Real to get home. Soreness still there, a bit, but not like when I started. AHR tonight 138, which is more what I had in mind for easy runs, that being less than 70% of my estimated HRR. Coughed more today, and after the run ended, but not a single cough for nearly 69 minutes during the run itself.

As things continue to deteriorate around me, I find I need to run. Not that it helps me deal with the crumbling situation, but it's an outlet. I usually come back angrier than I left, because running gives me time to think, and when I think about what's happening, I get angry because I'm so powerless to do anything about it. Tonight was a perfect metaphor -- 5.6 miles in the cold rain. Cold when I left, steaming when I got back.

Minus the Garmin, I'm estimating the distance and sorta estimating the pace (looked at my cellphone clock at beginning and end). Not estimating the effort -- I PUSHED this baby. Hardest run since Memphis, I'm pretty sure, and got harder as I went along. Started at 8:49, finished at 9:28. That is mostly likely 39:xx for what I estimate at 4.55.

Things a little brighter on the domestic front. We met with John and have a battle plan now. It may not give me what I want, but I think I'll be better equipped to move on no matter how things turn out.

Let's see, 48 degrees, raining, windy, I got up at 5:30 a.m. to go to work, and I feel like garbage. So what do I do this afternoon? I go for my longest run since Memphis -- 12.4 miles.

Started out slowly, picked up the pace as I got going and the rain came down harder. Stopped in the middle for Powerade and to get rid of the cotton t-shirt I stupidly put on under my tech shirt, then went back out. My pace before the break was 9:19. After the break must have been sub-9, because I finished at 9:06 overall. Even better I discovered that the track pants I thought were waterproof aren't, so I was carrying around a little extra weight for the last 3-4 miles. Now I'm REALLY beat.