Breaking the Wall

Sasha,

I had a few questions about my 8 yr. old running. He did a 5k last 4th of July and is doing the same one this next Saturday. He keeps saying how much he wants to do it but when it comes time to run each day he complains, I then remind him if he doesn't "train" he will not be allowed to run the race. I want to see some commitment out of him. I know he is just looking forward to the end result of crossing the finish line.

I know he is capable of more than he is giving, how do I help him try a bit harder?

I also know he can run a lot faster than he is. What do you do with your kids to help encourage them?

He will run his 5k in around 35 min. I think he is capable of atleast 30-32 min. Am I expecting too much from him for his age?

Britta:

Your expectations are definitely not unreasonable. Benjamin ran 5 Ks in the 22 minute range at the age of 8. His first 5 K was at the age of 5 years and 7 months, and his time was 27:25 on an accurate out and back course at 4500 feet. Benjamin does have a measure of talent, but I've seen kids that have a lot more than him - he is not that exceptional.

All of our kids complained about running at some point, and some still do on occasion. We just do not let them get away with it the same way we would not let them escape their other duties that are essential to their growth.

Some things that I have found helpful:

* Have a fixed distance that a child is expected to run each day. E.g. for a 5 year old, half a mile. 6 year old can handle a mile. 7 - 1.5, 8 through 10 - 2 miles. Then maybe 3 once they turn 11.

* Have an expectation of the slowest allowable pace. It should not be too high, but it should be fast enough to produce a training effect, teach them to work, and develop a sense of rhythm. Something like this has worked for us - early 5 years old - 12:00 per mile, later 5 - 10:00, 6 - 9:30, 7 - 9:00. Once they can run 9:00 pace comfortably, I do not increase the expectation of the slowest allowable pace as they get older because the pace is more than sufficient for the purpose until they reach teenage years.

* If the child fails to maintain the slowest allowable pace, hold his hand until he gets used to it.

* Have a system of rewards for putting in an honest effort, as well as for reaching certain standards. E.g when Benjamin broke 7:00 mile he got a Palm Pilot. When he ran 21:12 5 K he got Nokia 770 Tablet. When he broke 6:00 in the mile he got a netbook (Asus EEE PC). When Jenny broke 7:00 in the mile she got a Palm Pilot as well. When Julia was 4 she knocked on our bedroom door and said: "Can I have any toy I want if I break the mile?" She meant "if I break 10:00 in the mile". I said yes, of course, and we did a time trial the next day. She ran 9:57 and earned a shopping spree at Walmart. Every Saturday we have treats, and only the children that have run without complaining get to participate. So needless to say, when they feel inclined to complain, we remind them that come Saturday there will be no treats, and they stop immediately.

* Do not put up with complaining. Nip it in the bud. Tell them about Nephi and contrast his attitude against that of Laman and Lemuel. Explain the difference in the results.

I am impressed with the 10 miles in the stroller--how did you get William to tolerate it--or did he sleep?

April - all of our kids have behaved extremely well in the stroller. In fact, a stroller run is what Sarah has me do with them when they are fussy. I suppose the motion of the stroller and the humming of the wheels calms them down. So William was awake when I put him in, still awake when I took him out, and he made only one gooing sound when he saw the cows. He might have slept for part of the run.

Ah, I see. My daughter may be too old. She recently turned 3 and gets a bit restless after about 45 minutes. When she was younger she liked it better.

Sasha,

Thanks for your advice. My son, Dallin, when I took him out for a run yesterday immeditaley started crying when I said it was time to start running. I let this go on for about .2 miles and then I stopped and told him we were going home. I told him I would not run with him with this attitude. I then let him know he would not be running the 5k. He immediatley tried to patch things up and say he was sorry that he would stop crying.

I told him he could have one more chance but I would not run with him and drag him along if he was crying.

We then went home and he hopped on the TM in our home gym while my husband was also working out. He ran 3.1 miles no stopping. It was slow, 5.0 but none the less just another example to me that he can do much more.

I guess it still just surprises me that he was so devasted when I told him he could not run the 5k but gives me such a hard time when it is time to run.

I will try your suggestions, Thanks!