Go, you chicken fat, go away!

There was an entirely new "Lady" Liberty out this morning.  These people must be a dime a dozen.  His sign said Honk for Liberty so I yelled at him to give me a high five for liberty.  Of course he did.  I was glad to see the dead dog was gone.

I guess I should tell the story about the time I saw the bum passed out on the sidewalk.  When I lived 8 miles from work I would run home once a week.  This was a few months before I was a blogger.  One hot summer day as I was headed home saw an object in the middle of the sidewalk.  I couldn't make out what it was at first.  I had my headphones on, probably listening to The Final Countdown at the time, and I was carrying my cell phone which was my Garmin.  "Is that a pile of clothes?" was my first thought.  "No.  It's in the shape of a human being.  Clearly it can't be a human being because even though the sun is about to go down, the sidewalk is freakin' hot!"  I got a little closer and thought, "Is that a blow up doll?  I guess someone will be lonely tonight."  But as I got within 10 feet I saw that it was indeed a man.  I pulled my headphones out and said, "Oh crud."  As I ran by him I yelled at him, "Sir, are you okay?"  Nothing.  Again, "Oh crud."  I knew I had to stop and turn around.

At this point I look for any signs of movement.  The dude is just laying there, eyes closed head pointing upwards.  I yell again.  His chest doesn't even look like it's moving.  The only thing I could think of was how my father had just passed away a few months earlier, and I had to dress him for the funeral.  There didn't seem to be much difference between what this guy looked like and the corpse of my father.  I didn't want to touch him.  So I dialed 911 and told him that there was a body in the middle of the sidewalk and it's not showing any signs of life.  About that time two ladies came running up.  One bent over and woke the guy up.  I told the dispatcher he was alive, but even it didn't matter if he was alive or dead.  Nobody should be sleeping in the middle of a sidewalk especially with how hot it was.

Anyway, I was pretty much freaked out after that and only made it another mile before I called my wife to come pick me.  The moral of the story is if you see a dead body in the sidewalk, kick it.

Time - 46:50 (avg. pace 8:30)

Splits - 8:31, 8:24, 8:32, 8:33, 8:31, 4:20

How sad is it that I can't push the pace anymore without thinking about how RAD wants to beat me all the time?

Monday I was running by this lady who noticed my Ragnar shirt and said, "This weekend!"  So today when I saw two other ladies out on their power walk I remembered that little encounter.  Then I thought about how my Ragnar shirt is blue and the shirt I was wearing today was white.  Then I remembered that I forgot to put my Body Glide on today.  (Yep, I splurged on some Body Glide about a month ago.)  So I looked to make sure I wasn't bleeding.  I was good.  I guess you could say that since I didn't have a break through, I had a break through in nipular strengthening.

Time - 43:34 (avg. pace 7:54)

Splits - 7:57, 7:40, 7:56, 7:59, 7:55, 4:08

This picture was sent to me by a good friend of mine who may or may not be a member of this running blog.  At the risk of losing my following, I'm going to post it.

So Ragnar had this contest for 4 people to win a spot on teams comprised of former Biggest Loser contestants in their Southern California race.  Since a Biggest Loser contest at my work and the first Ragnar Del Sol relay are what got me back into running, I decided to write an essay and enter.  I did not win :(  But yesterday I got another email from Ragnar thanking me for entering the contest and saying that I get a free individual race entry to the Ragnar of my choice this year!  I'm excited.  I'll probably choose Vegas again.  That's a fun one.

This will probably be my last entry before Ragnar this weekend.  And I probably won't post the race report until late Sunday.  So to my huge Internet following, I apologize now.

The night was sultry.

What can I say about my 8th Ragnar?  Still as wild and crazy as ever.  I was on the same team as last year with a few new faces.  Van #2 was Michael, Corena, and Kristin who all ran last year, with newcomers Christy, Julie, and Vernon.  Van #1 was me, Glen, Eddie, and Shannon who were all in the same van last year, with newcomers Michael and Liz.  

We came up with nicknames for everyone in our van.  Glen was the Gazelle.  Eddie was the Turtle.  Michael was Hadji.  Liz was Stumbellina and sometimes the Cole-Fay.  Shannon was Muh-muh-muh-muh-muh-my-Corona but mostly Princess.  I was White Lightning.  At the start line I met Sione Fa who was a contestant on Season 7 of the Biggest Loser.  He told me he reads my blog all the time.  Just kidding.  But he was nice enough to pose for a picture with me.  Then another guy asked if he could get a picture with him.  I offered to take it then realized it was a former bishop of mine.  He was running on a team with another guy that I recruited into Ragnar in '08.

My first leg was 7.02 miles.  I decided to get wild and crazy and run without a shirt on.  Believe me when I say I wasn't as crazy as the guy who was wearing a thong and had temporary Ragnar symbols tattooed on both cheeks.  (You should have seen the look of horror on some kids' faces.)  However, I did do some manscaping of the pectoral region.  Let me set the stage.  A month ago I caught some Ragnar fever and wanted to shave my team name into my chest hair.  Our team name last year was Rio's Ruthless Runners.  Even I'm not that hairy to get the full name in, so here's what I came up with -

A couple of days later I got an email from our team captain saying he wanted to change the name to Innovators @ Rio!  So now I had to put Rogaine on and hope I could grow some hair back before the race.  I tried trimming it down to even things out.  As race day drew nearer I was getting worried.  A man who can't grow a nice rug of hair on his chest in a month isn't much of a man. 

To play it smart, I opted to shave the Ragnar symbol in my chest with the not-as-manly follicles that remained.  It was one of the crazier things I've done.  Some of the pictures that were taken have prompted me to do another round of P90X.  I'm starting to get a bit Pillsburyish.

Am I lopsided?  As you can see, the symbol is there, but not as profound as I hoped for.  Did I mention I did my back, too?

Notice the guy in front of me.  He passed me like I was standing still.  His shirt said captain.  I would have been mad that he passed me, but he complimented my "cut."  Now look at the guy in front of him.  He was dressed like Lieutenant Dangle.  His shorts were quite short and snug.  I couldn't resist giving him a good game as I passed him.  He chuckled.

I projected a 7:38 pace for this leg but could only manage a 7:39.  My splits were 7:11, 7:33, 7:35, 7:44, 7:47, 7:52, and 7:53.  That kind of set the tone for not hitting the rest of my projections :(

After our van finished our first set of legs we went and showered at a friend/coworkers house near the second major exchange.  Then I get a text message from Kelli.  She said she just parked next to a van with my name on it.  I'm like, big deal.  Someone else running is named Burt.  So I say, "My name?  It says Burt McCumber on their van?"  She said, "Yeah.  It was like - who the heck is Burt McCumber, or something like that."  I said, "Shut up!"  She said, "No really.  I'll take a picture next time I see it."  I told her to find out who it was, too because I wanted to punch them.

Turns out my cyberstalking skills have taken me to a whole new level.  Every year I wish everyone good luck who has Ragnar on their Athlinks.com calendar.  I guess this team has a bunch of Athlinkers who wonder who I am.  Excuse me for being polite!  ;)

My second leg was 6.46 miles.  This was crazy.  A portion of this was on a very rocky trail in the dark.  Then there was this very steep downhill.  I charged down it as fast and as safe as I could.  There's no way people didn't get hurt there.  Right after that I got passed by a girl.  I tried running right behind her because the light from our combined head lamps was helping with the visibility.  I couldn't keep up with her for very long though.  The uphill, sand, rocks, dark, and cold were all momentum killers.  My average pace was 8:51 and my splits were 8:22, 8:41, 8:43, 9:01, 8:54, 9:14, and a 9:07 pace for the 0.46.

I got to see Kelli and Jose.  I also met Eric.

I know it's dark, but no I did not have my hand on the golf ball in Kelli's bum.

I did get some good pics of Jose changing his clothes in the van.  I'll post them later.  I also saw Team Running 4 Nie.  That was the team I was on when I did Wasatch Back.  They were an all girl team this time. 

My last leg was 7.86 miles.  There was more than 800 feet of downhill so I figured I'd fly through it.  But my legs were not cooperating.  I managed a sub 8 pace.  Yep.  7:59.  One day I'd like to run it while I'm fresh.  This is almost the exact same last leg I ran last year.  Last year I ran it faster.  I think my calf tightened up to the point that I adjusted my stride, and then my hamstring tightened up, also.  But I'm all right with it.  These races are just for fun.  And fun is what we had.  Can't wait for the next one.