I had my follow up appointment today. The results from my surgery were not good. I will not be running any more full or half marathons. It wasn't a torn meniscus....I had torn and free floating cartilage right behind the patella. It was from some type of previous injury that I had sometime during my life. It was made worse and eventually tore from running. I now have a hole that is bone on bone. They put holes in the patella to try to stimulate an immune reaction to try to produce some scarring over the bone. If it works, it will cover up the bone and I will have to be careful to not go down hills, hikes or run. Best result would be that it works and I am careful throughout my life and end up keeping my knee. If I continue to run and hike and put my knee in danger of having a cartilage tear again, they will repeat this surgery and hope the pain won't be too bad. If I keep running I will most likely have to have a total knee replacement within 10 years. He told me that if I had to run, I could train for a 5K instead of a full or half marathon. I told him that running a 5K is only 3 miles! Really...that is all I can train up to? I tried to keep it together in the doctors office. When I got to the car and shut the door, I had a nice good cry that has now lasted all day. If only...I keep thinking...If only. I was mad and told my husband that he got his dream come true...no more running or marathons or hiking from me and I hoped he enjoyed 500 pound, depressed women because that is what he was going to be married to. He has been feeling bad for telling me that 3 stress fractures and a surgery were enough to put a family though and that running marathons should be over. He was right, he has put up with a lot and I love him for it. After hearing me sob on the phone after the doctor appointment, he told me that he would buy me the nicest road bike, he would pay for swim lessons so that I could try a triathlon. He said he had been online trying to figure out how to fix this and was even looking into some treatment at the MAYO Clinic, but the science just isn't there yet. He really has been sweet to put up with me, my running schedules and all of my aches and pains that I have been worried about that would interfere with my marathon. I am sure that I am annoying to live with, especially when you are not a nutty exerciser. I know that I should try to be positive and things could be a lot worse, but right now I just want to feel sorry for myself! I just need a day to get it out of my system.
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